#forgotten the little french i learnt in school

[ibouchouchou]

he sounds so good speaking french 😍 yes captain!!!

[may-day-voice]

Prom Night Lights | The Reunion

2nd Edition w/ Denki Kaminari, Hanta Sero, Hitoshi Shinsou & Tenya Iida

please do not repost, but you have permission to reblog :)

• Watch/ Listen on YouTube: https://youtu.be/onhumQcEcs8

• Read on Wattpad: https://www.wattpad.com/1060373778-prom-night-lights-the-reunion-2nd-edition

DENKI KAMINARI | Ivre

It was strange for Denki Kaminari to be so frank with everyone after his many successes in his career. Especially after he had drunk one too many cups of punch. Upon arriving at his old haunting grounds, he parked his car just inside the gates before bumping into Ashido, the both of them arriving at the same time where Kirishima and Sero were hanging around. A few bits of conversation was tossed around here and there until Bakugou came and went, following after another alumni in the process.

Kaminari was thrilled to see his old classmates, buddying up to Jirou upon meeting her, as well as a few other members of his class. Everything was going smoothly, until he helped himself with some of Sato's punch along with Kirishima.

He became a bit of a mess.

"Sero, hey!" He called from across the table. "About that text message you sent-"

"Uh dude, now's not a good time," interrupted Sero with a nervous pull of his lips, his eyes darting around the auditorium.

"Huh? Okay," slovenly agreed Kaminari. "I'll talk to you later, actually, have you seen Aoyama anywhere?"

"Uh, yeah, I just spoke to him a while ago. He's probably at the-"

"Oh there he is!" Exclaimed Kaminari with a wave towards the drinks bar. "Aoyama, hey!" He immediately stood to his feet, a little flushed before he walked up to the fabulous-looking blond, spotting his attire still clean and immaculately refined.

"Ah, Kaminari," greeted Aoyama with a smile. "You look worse for wear."

"Nah, I'm good," reassured Kaminari. "I just wanted to say thank you for your help. I know it was short notice but your tips and tricks really helped."

"You mean that very quick phone call about French?"

Kaminari nodded slowly while he took another sip of his punch, happily enjoying the night. "I mean, I had them going for a little while, but they beat me fair and square. It's great though, thank you so much!"

Aoyama eyed the drunken blond, amused and concerned, before he began to wonder about his predicament. "So, um, where is this villain?"

"Aww, stop calling them that," reminded Kaminari before he pulled out a small device from his pocket. He pushed the device into Aoyama's face, the screen honing on a location very close to Gym Gamma, beeping repetitively.

"They're safe and sound in my car, see?" slurred Kaminari before he placed the honing device back into the pocket of his pants. Clumsily.

Aoyama eyed the blond in mild disbelief. "They're here?"

"Of course, my job needs me to be near them at all times," answered Kaminari, while he finally pocketed the device. "I can't leave them alone at mine."

"Well, yes, but they shouldn't stay alone in the car all night," voiced Aoyama.

"Relax, they're cuffed so they can't escape," reassured Kaminari.

A gasp escaped Aoyama's lips upon hearing this predicament, his tone swaying and swooning disappointingly. "But what about the little Cherie?" He questioned. "Sitting in the car while we're having the night of our lives. I can only imagine what they may be thinking, being locked up all alone unable to do anything."

Kaminari's drunken smile slowly faded after processing Aoyama's words. How long has he been at this reunion now? It may have been a couple of hours, maybe even more. He couldn't tell with all the fun and laughs he joined in speaking and conversing with his old classmates.

"Maybe it is best to invite them here, hm?" suggested Aoyama. "They don't sound as bad as you make them out to be. And besides, as Heroes, we have to set an example."

Kaminari's shoulders slumped at Aoyama's suggestion, his eyes staring down at the floor of the auditorium with an embarrassed look crossing his face. He hadn't been the greatest host, more so, the greatest friend despite the professional stance on his responsibilities.

"I should bring them in, huh?" He asked, a little disheartened at his lack of empathy.

All Aoyama did was beam a smile.

——

You occupied yourself in the car with a basic beat knocking the door and shaking the cuffs. Night had already fallen outside and the sound of crickets hit your ears, but time felt still that you had no idea how much had passed. An hour or two? There wasn't much to keep you entertained while Kaminari enjoyed his reunion. You could hear the bass of the music play from the car, spotting the lights of the auditorium glow through the canopies of the trees that lined the walkways. You smiled at the rhythm, recognizing Earphone Jack's music.

You sighed, while you slumped in the passenger seat, reclining the seat a little to find some comfort despite the cuffs and the ankle brace. You regretted not bringing a book to keep you stimulated. If anything, you didn't sign up to hours of boredom.

KNOCK KNOCK

You blinked out of your bored stupor, spotting the blond outside of the car, waving cheerfully yet holding an embarrassed look on his face. It took you back until he walked over to the driver's seat, sitting beside you in the car. It was no surprise to smell the alcohol on him, hitting your senses like a tidal wave.

"So..." started Kaminari. "You doing okay?"

He was definitely drunk.

"I'm fine, I've been worse," you replied with a small smile. "Just the usual checkup tonight?"

"Well, um..." Kaminari's eyes looked away from yours, almost ashamed. "I'm sorry."

"Huh? About what?"

"Leaving you here while I'm inside having the time of my life."

You tried to look into Kaminari's eyes, but he made it difficult. Was this really how he felt? Or was that the alcohol that reeked from him? Learning about the Pro-Hero over the course of his supervision was unpredictable, but watching him now genuinely saddened made you wonder if all of his inhibitions had crumbled.

"You're just doing your job," you reassured, lifting your cuffs to prove a point. "Besides, taking me in a large outing filled with Pro-Heroes and the like would have been a bad idea."

Still, Kaminari wallowed.

"Roi de la Fee? Prince Charmant? Cherie?"

"Stop."

The look on Kaminari's face did not change while he stared off blankly into the car's dashboard. He sat there silent, succumbing to his emotions about the situation currently playing out.

"This is my job, but you're not the job," he explained, his voice laced with a dash of croakiness. "You're a decent human being, and I've left you here like a dog."

"Well, I did say that I was happy to just be under house arrest tonight," you reassured with a wry smile. "That way you could go out and enjoy yourself."

"No, that's not it. I brought you along saying that I needed to keep an eye on you, but really... um..."

Kaminari's eyes continued to cast down on the dashboard, refusing to look you in the eye while he mumbled around with his words and thoughts. You figured he was well drunk, the smell of him didn't deny him of that, but while his eyes rose to meet yours, there was a glint of guilt.

"I guess, I really wanted a plus one here, but at the last minute, I decided to leave you."

There it was. Uncertainty. Similar to how you saw him back at your capture and how he reacted to the situation. However, the both of you conversed many days and nights now, recalling that impromptu outing to a trivial recreation that was mini putt-putt, and have since learnt more about one another. You figured at the very least, his cold feet were brought upon after seeing a friend of his by the academy's gates - a pink-haired, pink-skinned beauty who waved him over.

You sighed and hummed in reply, uncertain yourself as to how to respond to this confession of sorts. Reassurance may look like pity, laughter would definitely make light of his feelings about it, but in the back of your mind, you felt oddly sympathetic to his emotions. You almost felt excited that you were within the walls of the illustrious school.

"I can take you back to mine," Kaminari offered while he scrounged for his keys. "I don't want you to be uncomfortable-"

"Oh no," you interrupted, grabbing hold of his hands. "You are way too inebriated to be driving."

Kaminari only stared at you, dumbfounded, realizing the folly of his suggestion. "Right, um... well I can't give you the wheel and-"

"Kaminari, why did you come back to the car?"

A silence fell between the both of you while you still kept your eyes on Kaminari, the blond taking a deep breath and attempting to think clearly.

"I... I... I spoke to a friend, and he suggested inviting you in to join us tonight."

"Oh? So the Heroes know you have a villain captive by the gates?" You teased in a small jest.

"Not only that but they want to meet you. Not in a scary way, you know, in a good way. Like they want to get to know you, not like interrogating you just, really meet you, and-"

"I guess you've been saying good things about me," you interrupted softly. "Well, as long as you're my chaperone for the night?"

Kaminari turned his eyes onto your smiling ones, beaming with a grin, his face still running warm from the alcohol. "Of course! I mean, if you want to."

A soft smile tugged at the corner of your lips while your hands still held onto Kaminari's throughout this conversation. "I would be honored," you replied with a slight bow of your head.

Immediately in his drunken stupor, Kaminari leapt from his seat and out of his car, running over to your door. Sadly, in a momentary lapse of drunkenness, he had forgotten about your wrists still bound by the door with cuffs, causing Kaminari to immediately in his hurry unlatch you from them.

"Sorry," he apologized while he helped you out of his car.

"It's all right Kaminari. I'm okay," you reassured, finding your feet and soon holding Kaminari up as a support for his clumsy ones. He paid no mind though, allowing you to keep his arm propped against you, ensuring his stability on his weak drunken legs.

"Shall we?" He asked.

"Lead the way."

Kaminari shifted while you held onto his arms, propping his weight onto you. Still, he held you, leading this drunken sway from his car down the laneways towards the bright lights of the auditorium. He leaned his head on yours, smelling the alcohol and feeling the flush of his skin on yours. Kaminari had never been this close before, knowing in the back of your mind that his inhibitions were driving him now more than his common sense. You allowed his actions to dictate the trek to the auditorium, until his breath tickled your ear, his words breathless.

"I love you..."

Your smile disappeared for a moment, still on the walk while he continued on.

"... and that's the beginning and end of everything."

You sighed with a heavy heart, smirking at his quotability still drunk, and knowing you've been reading The Great Gatsby thrice now. Yet his choice of words only hurt.

"May I ask, was this friend of yours your French tutor you mentioned earlier?" You asked curiously, trying to keep your thoughts at bay.

All you received was a nervous chuckle from Kaminari, his grin only captivating you despite the hindsight. "That obvious?" He asked while he clumsily tripped on his feet every once in a while.

"Just an educated guess, Cherie."

HANTA SERO | Outfoxed

Hanta Sero smiled up at the large white gates of his academy, memories flooding back in torrents and waves on all of the adventures, and a few mishaps, he got himself involved in with his ragtag of friends. After making his way to his old haunting grounds, Sero greeted Kirishima outside Gym Gamma, smart and casual for the evening to begin.

"Oh yeah, your date!" exclaimed Kirishima in mid-conversation. "How did it go?"

"Uh... it went pretty all right actually," answered Sero, grinning wryly while he recalled a few points made during his rendezvous in the city's museum.

"As long as you feel good about it, there shouldn't be any problems," piped Kirishima's partner. "Seeing them again soon?"

"Um..."

"Hey guys!"

Sero inwardly sighed in relief hearing Ashido's cry from afar, interrupting the conversation, and soon finding Kaminari along with her setting his mind at ease. Kaminari was the only one amongst the group who had full knowledge of his working relationship with you. Having heard of his work with the Commission, and his constant supervision over one of their more villainous assets, Sero thought he could find some advice from the Stun Gun Hero and close friend.

That was until the night was underway.

With Kaminari and Kirishima drunk from punch, Sero had to unfortunately be the sober one at the reunion, seeing how Bakugou couldn't care less about the current situation. A loose eye around the dance floor ensured Kirishima was taken care of, and soon enough, Kaminari became chatty with old schoolmates, leaving Sero a moment of reprieve for himself. He sighed in exasperation, finally relaxing into his chair until he spotted something on his dirty plate.

It looked awfully familiar.

Salutations Bucky.

Sero choked on his breath sitting up on his seat, immediately turning his eyes to scan the enormous auditorium, filled to the brim of every student across their year. How on earth did you get inside, he thought, his eyes darting around the room hoping to spot something familiar - your fur-trimmed clothes, your outfit, even your eyes.

He didn't even notice Kaminari approach him from across the table, his arms leaning onto it in a drunken stupor.

"Sero, hey! About that text message you sent-"

"Uh dude, now's not a good time," interrupted Sero anxiously.

"Huh? Okay, I'll talk to you later, actually, have you seen Aoyama anywhere?"

Sero's mind was elsewhere, his eyes were focused more so through the crowd rather than Kaminari's presence whatsoever. "Uh, yeah, I just spoke to him a while ago. He's probably at the-"

"Oh there he is!"

Sero didn't pay any mind to Kaminari's movements or whereabouts. He only managed to notice something move in the distance, something out of sorts until a flash of eyes met his, disappearing into the crowd. Idle chatter and the cacophony of voices drowned his senses. He could only spot a glimpse of this person, who weaved through the crowd until he emerged finding nobody in the middle of nowhere.

Perhaps he was imagining it. Surely if he walked back to his table that card wouldn't be there. All a trick of the mind, and probably one too many patrols in the city. He scratched the back of his head, playing with the bristles that tickled his palm without realizing he was still being watched.

You stood by the makeshift bar, eyeing the Pro Hero in the middle of the crowd with a smile. Sneaking into the event was a little troublesome, but nothing like taking out a waiter and disguising as them solved that problem. It was strange to walk around... normal. No black eye makeup, no mask, no outfit. Just you, in a waiter's outfit, but truly you.

Looking around the auditorium was a sight to behold. Everyone was here, and you couldn't help the coy feeling that bubbled inside knowing you stood amongst the most prominent Heroes to grace Musatafu this day and age. To your estimate, you had eavesdropped on a fair few conversations, finding some boring, and others mildly amusing. To your dismay, there had been nothing relative to what you were searching for. Nothing close to the Paranormal Liberation Front. Perhaps a reunion wasn't the right locale to discuss work matters, at least in the company you kept.

You started to reset your tray of horderves by the bar, attempting to keep your cover when a strikingly handsome man stood beside you, helping himself to some already on your tray.

"Couldn't wait?" You asked.

"Ah, but it is just too delectable to wait upon Cher," he spoke, his flamboyant nature almost lighting up the room. That accent was just-

"Are you French?" You asked, earning a dazzling smile from the man.

"Oui, well, I do speak French. Aoyama," he introduced with a bow.

You stared at the man inquisitively, wondering about his mannerisms, his speech, and how he projected himself until-

"Nice to meet you," you started while you set yourself with the tray to serve. "I have a question that you might help me with."

"Whatever for?" Asked Aoyama with a flamboyant flair.

"You reckon there are better alternatives to Mio Caro? I don't mind it but I think it's cute."

You soon walked into the crowd, leaving Aoyama off-guard at least. You merged back into the crowd with a smile on your face, semi-proud of your elusiveness while you kept an eye on where Sero had disappeared amongst the large body of alumni around the auditorium. It didn't stop you from stealing an horderve or two for yourself until you felt a tug on your shirt.

"Hey, been working hard?"

The voice was not familiar, and yet it wasn't also at your level, looking down to find a short man beside you. He grinned widely while his eyes looked you up and, well, up.

"You know I could take you behind the scenes of this academy. Show you around," he spoke with an attempt at temptation.

You stifled a chortle that almost burst through your nostrils, only to cover it clearing your throat. You looked around the room, hoping that ignoring him and his comment may be the solution.

"I know all of the more romantic spots here."

Or at least you thought.

"No thank you sir," you spoke as formally as you could.

"Really? You're the most gorgeous person I've seen aside from my fellow classmates here," he continued.

"Why thank you. But I must be going."

You continued your way through the crowds, handing more horderves around only to feel that presence next to you. That short man just didn't quit.

"How about we step outside for some fresh air?" He suggested. "Get out of the noise."

"I quite like it here sir," you rebutted, noticing the tray growing empty until the last horderve was procured through the crowd. "The noise helps me think."

"Well then, if you like to be noisy we could-"

Slam

You quickly threw the empty tray into the man's face. Not so difficult given how short he was before you teleported yourself across the room, your light bursting momentarily through the air. You hoped the commotion with the tray would keep eyes away from you, appearing on the other side, out of sight.

You breathed a sigh of relief. You had never seen persistence to that degree. Still, you couldn't blame the guy for having some good taste, smiling at the thought with a roll of your eyes. You brushed the uniform down from the commotion earlier when the sound of footsteps caught your ear, spotting a shadow that stretched ahead of you from the fairy lights.

Until the tall frame of a dual-haired man in a white suit exited the party, with phone in hand.

He looked distracted, paying attention more to his phone call than to you standing by the doors, until you recognised that it was the one and only Shouto.

"There is nothing more you found?" he asked calmly and yet with a presence that would make your blood run cold, frozen even, despite the irony in that.

"I don't trust them," he continued on the line. "Has the Commission been a little co-operative on their end?"

The word caught your ear, perked them in curiosity and interest, while you leaned against the open doors, intently listening in on this one-sided conversation. A sigh was all you heard, hearing the frustration in the Hero's voice before his eyes looked up at the night sky, watching the stars sparkle brightly above.

"Keep an eye out on anything that's related to Rainmaker at least," he ordered over the phone. "There's something about him I don't like."

A pause cut through the air, waiting for another piece of the conversation to continue only to meet the Hero's exasperated sigh.

"No, it's got nothing to do with my Love, all right?" he spat, almost embarrassed over the comment, until the light tone of a laugh could be discerned over his phone. "Send Aizawa my regards."

With that, Todoroki hung up on his phone, turning back into the auditorium before his eyes merely glanced at you, his scar prominent in the light. You stared at awe at the Hero, watching his aloof and nonchalant gaze follow you while he walked, only for that expression to soften into a smile, nodding at your presence. Your eyes followed him back inside while he affixed his cuffs on his suit. For someone who had a cold front, he was actually a warm person, you thought, leaning back onto the doors again.

"Hate to break it to you, but you seem to be stuck," spoke a voice beside you, catching you off guard, until a smile cracked on your lips.

"All right, you caught me, fair and square," you conceded with your arms in the air, turning to face Sero now by the doors. Sero only stared, seeing you without the getup, without the makeup, without the added exhaustion from troublesome chases the both of you endured. He just saw you, bare for him to see.

"Like what you see?" You piped, almost shyly this time around.

"What are you doing here?" He asked, suspicious of your presence.

"It's all in the news, and I didn't want to miss seeing all of your friends," you replied in jest. "The ones who celebrated your birthday I'd imagine? Besides, it's good to get out and meet new people. And there's nothing worth going after in town anyway."

Sero continued to only stare, lost while he absorbed the most normal facade you wore. His eyes trailed along the outfit, while you chuckled inwardly, feeling the awkwardness in the air.

"I'm sorry," slowly spoke Sero. "It's just... did you steal that outfit?"

"No," you replied in slight offense. "I borrowed it."

Sero eyed you again with a raised brow, assessing your response with suspicion. As he should be. Finding you here amongst his friends was a surprise, but ever since that "date", and every other time he encountered you, there was always a catch.

"... after I knocked the guy out," you ended, earning a slightly panic-strickened Sero to react intensely momentarily. "But they're fine! I made them comfortable... in a kitchen pantry, but they're not hurt!"

Sero sighed exasperatedly at your explanation, giving up in this weak interrogation for your supposed gatecrash into the reunion. Soon the tempo of the music changed, turning into a slow and rhythmic sway. Sero turned to spot the dance floor now calmer, filled with those who began to slow dance in the room. It was a magical sight with the fairy lights, almost like graduation returned to the present again.

"Don't worry, I'll leave. I've brought too much attention anyway," you reassured him. "At least let me have one doggy bag to go."

You turned to the Pro Hero only to find his hand open to you, his torso in a semi-bow while he smiled. It was an odd interaction, one you weren't familiar with.

"May I offer this dance before I do?" He asked genially. "You're here now, so you may as well experience prom."

Your confused stare slowly turned into a smile, taking his hand and being pulled into a sway just outside the doors. He was extremely coordinated, no less from the most agile Pro Hero you've encountered, but he held you gently in his arms while you instinctively without thought, laid your head on his chest. Though the crowd inside enjoyed the atmosphere, you enjoyed Sero's company, underneath the night sky, swaying in his arms. A smile crept on your lips, involuntarily you'd admit. But the sound of Sero's heartbeat felt calming, the deep thrum engulfing your senses.

You felt... normal.

Sero held your body against his wondering how this felt so different from every other time he had encountered you outside of this academy. It felt as if you melted into him, allowing him to take the lead this time. Relinquishing control must have been foreign to you, or so Sero thought, still swaying alone by the doors outside of anyone's prying eyes.

The both of you stopped while you held each other in your arms, embracing this feeling the both of you shared in this moment together. You never would have imagined baring everything you were to this man, staring back into his genuine grin and eyes, silhouetted by the fairy lights behind him. You peeked past him, spying on the crowds that congregated in the auditorium until a familiar face strode gracefully towards Sero from behind.

"Sero, mon ami," called out Aoyama, his hands waving in the air. "I've been looking for you everywhere."

Sero blinked from the sudden disappearance of your figure, left with only fractals of light before he turned around to greet Aoyama.

"Hey Aoyama," he replied nervously in acknowledgement.

"How goes that thief you were talking about?"

Sero's hairs stood on end in panic. Were you spotted with him, dancing moments ago together? If he were lucky, he would imagine Aoyama commenting about him dancing with the catering staff, a good sign if he did.

"Well, they've been... elusive," answered Sero, his eyes darting around the doors hoping to spot you somewhere nearby.

"Elusive indeed. I've been thinking about another kind of code name you could tease them with next time you spot them," motioned Aoyama with a sense of pride.

"Huh?"

"I've been thinking that calling them Mio Caro was too, what's the word, specific? It sounded boring the more I thought about it."

Sero wondered what came about with this conversation, but to his relief, Aoyama showed no inkling of him witnessing you with him moments before he interrupted the moment.

"Oh really?" Slowly asked Sero, suspicious about how this came about. "What other ideas do you-"

"Aoyama!" Cooed a voice from outside. "Come meet them! They're awesome!"

Sero and Aoyama both turned to find Kaminari, still drunk, being led or leading his plus one to the door. It looked to be a mess from the both of them, more so because of Kaminari's inebriation. Both men instinctively approached the couple, Sero taking Kaminari and Aoyama offering his arm to his plus one, the villain turned Commission's witness. The group, despite the sloppiness in Kaminari's slurred speech, made their ways back to the doors, unaware of them being watched by you, your eyes taking in the scene, but mostly on Sero before he disappeared into the auditorium.

You breathed a sigh of relief, lying your body atop the roof of the auditorium, staring up at the stars in the sky twinkling much like the fairy lights inside. Your chest bubbled with laughter, happily taking in that moment with Sero - the warmth of his hands, the sway of his feet, the sight of his smile while he led you step by step.

Gate crashing was worth it. You've experienced prom, even if it was only for that brief moment.

"Thanks Bucky."

HITOSHI SHINSOU | Soulmate

It was a long day at the Commission's office before you hopped out to make your way to your reunion. Given that you had only recently spoken to Bakugou and Kirishima due to their mission on Nabu Island, you smiled at the thought to see them dressed up for the night, rather than their disheveled, bandaged selves from whatever happened in the quiet town.

The thought of the reports were fresh in your mind while you strolled towards the academy. Headshots of the suspect were included as well, seeing his smiling face in frame. Compared to most captives, he wasn't cocky, but it looked genuine despite the photo. Still, interrogations would commence in a few days seeing that due process was required before any more information could be collated together.

You spotted a few familiar faces in the street heading towards the school, most of them faces from other classes that you recognized until a mop of purple hair caught your eye loitering by the tall white gates. Hitoshi Shinsou was dressed to the nines, prim and proper, but not in that dark purple suit.

"Hey," you called from afar, catching his eye before you reached him by the gates. "Were you waiting long?"

"Not really," he answered dryly, stretching his limbs. "I was actually getting comfortable."

"I'm just a little disappointed," you commented with a smirk, catching wind of Shinsou's confused expression. "I was really hoping to see you in that suit again."

"Oh, that suit," he murmured apathetically before he sniggered under his breath, walking up to you lazily before his nose hovered close to yours. "Am I not good enough?"

You couldn't help but burst into a giggle with him being so close. An involuntary reaction you were sure, but it gave him a smile seeing you react the way you did, grabbing hold of your hand while his fingers entwined in yours.

"Well you've proven the suit doesn't make the man," you quipped happily.

You could feel his chuckle close to your ear before he slowly pulled away from you, taking you by the hand back into your academy once more. It felt surreal to walk through the paths again, recalling the times you've seen Shinsou take laps around the dorms during off-hour training. Memories flooded back, watching the new generation of students walking past, whispering under their breaths. It didn't phase you though. You could hear every word they were thinking, smiling at their curious natures.

"Did I miss something?" Asked Shinsou beside you.

"Not much," you snarked through your giggles. "Just heard some good things about you."

"Oh really?"

You beamed a smile at him, gently caressing his hand with your thumb while you tried to keep his eye on you. "Sounds like you're a role model for the underprivileged, but you also have a fan club."

News of such magnitude caused his shoulders to stiffen. You spotted it despite the flattering suit he wore only making you chuckle deeper. The look in his eye was a multitude of emotions, ranging from confused, shocked, and utter disappointment. You continued to comfort his hand in yours, still walking past while spotting a group of students whispering, attempting to steal gazes at the both of you making your way to Gym Gamma.

"It's hard to ignore," you concluded, still looking up at Shinsou who looked away, slightly embarrassed. "Want to know what they're saying-"

"No," he interrupted. "I don't need any self-serving praise. I'm here to spend a night with the one person I trust the most. And work needs to be as far away as possible."

You sighed in agreement. Work was becoming a little too close to home having taken on the case with the assassin and the Tartarus prison break. The trip to Polis Massa Bay yielded very little results despite witness accounts of a trio who fit some description to the members of the prison coup. There were no other sightings during that weekend.

Night was on its approach with the dark blues merging with the last dregs of sunset pinks in the sky. Ahead, you spotted the last of your alumni entering the auditorium, pulling gently on Shinsou's arm to quicken your pace. You weren't extremely late by any means, but seeing that most invitees have already entered made it seem so.

"No need to rush Kitten," spoke Shinsou, still allowing you to pull him by the arm.

"Come on, we can't miss Iida's and Yaoyoruzu's welcoming speech," you advised.

"Is that the highlight of your night?"

"No, but it'll make for great vocabulary building."

Shinsou sighed at your rationale but can only smile at your fervent need to join the others inside. It wasn't often either of you would surround yourself with many friends, whether it was work, or just general bad timing. To him, he still couldn't fathom the idea of calling the others friends, but a slip of the tongue here and there had seeped into his own vocabulary, only caught by your ear. He took a deep breath before the both of you reached the doors to the auditorium, filled to the brim of all the students of their graduating year, now grown older and hopefully wiser.

"Shall we?" You asked while your arm wrapped around his.

Shinsou said nothing, only smiling at you before he took the lead inside the brightly lit auditorium, sprinkled with fairy lights.

——

After taking your seats and enjoying the night's festivities, the both of you soon caught up with your former classmates, holding conversation and learning more on the gossip. You smiled at the sight of Bakugou and his now fiancé, recalling that weekend away bumping into the both of them there and chuckling wryly at the awkwardness at the time. You soon noticed Shinsou approach Bakugou and converse with him from afar, watching the irate blond pull faces at him, most probably after a mild insult. You shook your head at how the two of them would still butt heads with one another until you felt something different in the air.

Out of all the surface thoughts you could hear, you suddenly gained access to the conversation between Shinsou and Bakugou, staring off at nothing while you sat at your table amongst the rest of its residents still chatting away. It was difficult to ignore while you intently listened.

"Eh? What about it, Eyebags?" Spoke Bakugou while he took a sip of punch.

"Congratulations," simply replied Shinsou, opening his hand out to the blond.

Bakugou stared at him with a furrowed brow, however he took his hand, shaking it firmly. "Tch, it was nothing."

"So how do you feel?"

"What do you mean?"

"Was the frustration worth it in the end? You were pretty mad on that lunch date," reminded Shinsou with a smirk.

"It's because people like you and your weakass partner were getting in my way the whole time we were there," complained Bakugou.

You cringed at his comment. Bakugou was Bakugou, even though he had softened his edges over the years. Still, it didn't help his rude undertones every once in a while.

"Hey, firstly, they're not weak, and secondly, you just had the worst case of bad luck," explained Shinsou with a slight harsh edge to his voice.

Bakugou scoffed before downing the last of his punch, eyeing the crowd of guffawing alumni until they laid on his fiancé not too far away, laughing and chiding away with his friends at their table. Shinsou caught that look on his face, that cocky smirk obvious to see.

"You worry too much sometimes," he uttered nonchalantly.

"What was that?" Snapped Bakugou.

"You want to make a grandiose gesture, and I bet that you had to slow down when it all went down, right?"

Bakugou sneered at Shinsou's question, almost turning his lips into a pout which caught Shinsou's eye again.

"So, you did take my advice."

"Shut it Eyebags," snapped Bakugou once more, earning a chuckle from the sleep-deprived man while he enjoyed his cup of punch. "You say one more goddamn word-"

"Your secret is safe with me," interrupted Shinsou. "No one needs to know, and besides, nobody would believe that you and I enjoyed that lunch date together anyway."

The sound of Bakugou's scoff echoed in your mind again, realizing that you had finally discovered at least to some degree what Shinsou was insinuating back at Polis Massa Bay. The mere idea that Bakugou had the patience to go through, let alone listen to, Shinsou's advice was astonishing. Perhaps there was a mutual respect between the two over the years since their first encounter back at UA.

You felt proud, swelling almost inside with content that Shinsou grew to become sociable in his own way. However, your eyes turned towards the duo across the hall, spotting Shinsou's eye now on you, sipping his punch from the cup he held. Your shoulders stiffened at his gaze, turning your eyes away from him in slight embarrassment. No one had noticed your reactions at the table as of yet, however Shinsou's words in your head echoed loudly.

"Enjoyed the show?" He asked in your head, feeling it lower between your shoulders, unsure how to react until a hand calmly rested on your back.

You turned up to find Shinsou now by your side with a smirk on his face, as if he could feel every fibre in your being burn with mortification over your impromptu eavesdropping. The next thing you knew, he took you by the hand, leading you from the table and walking with you around the auditorium, circling the dance floor filled with already jovial fellow alumni.

"We never did dance at our graduation, didn't we?" asked Shinsou, taking your mind from the earlier teasing nature he threw at you so suddenly.

"No, I think we both agreed to stay out of it," you answered, reminiscing the year graduation was underway, filled with already drunken students enjoying the night from years of tutelage.

Shinsou hummed in thought while he clutched onto your arm, your hand in his, until the song slowly turned into a slower tempo, watching the swarm of alumni shift on the floor and the couples taking stage. Still standing outside the ring of the dance floor, Shinsou turned to face you, guiding your hand onto his shoulder while he held onto you, soon swaying on the spot irregardless of whoever was watching.

Hitoshi, we should be on the dance floor, you spoke in your head, staring up into his tired yet smiling eyes.

It doesn't matter. We can dance wherever we want, he replied back in your mind, his lopsided smile turning into a small grin.

The both of you shared this moment together, swaying to and fro outside of everybody else, to the tune of your own beat and in each other's company. You melted into Shinsou, while you listened to the beat of his heart in his chest, slow and calm. Shinsou only wrapped you in his arms, content to have you, and yet pondered further on many things. After conversing with Bakugou over the course of his life decisions, at least unexpectedly, Shinsou thought more on the topic at hand. It felt just right for him to make plans.

And he hoped you weren't eavesdropping this time, while his hands trailed up your back, holding you to him.

TENYA IIDA | Belated

The sound of your breath heaved violently in your lungs while you rushed through the streets, every so often weaving past passersby with ease.

Some of the time.

"Hey watch it!"

"Oops, sorry!" You called back with a twirl, adjusting a piece of your outfit while still in motion. Crossing the street yielded catastrophic results, at least for some of the drivers who blared their horns at your seeming obliviousness.

You grinned happily at your anticipation, the excitement brewing in your gut when you spotted the tall white gates ahead belonging to the most prestigious Hero Academy in all of Musatafu. To step foot through those gates felt like a privilege in itself, otherwise it was just general hype over the years staring off into the distance from your school grounds years ago.

Why must you be such a fanatic? No wonder people saw you differently, you thought, shrugging it away until you approached the tall gates, handing your pass for this reunion that most probably was about to proceed with its orientation speech. You bit your lip nervously. After being allowed onto the premises, a little dread crept in your mind that you were going to miss the reason why you were invited.

Your boss, Tenya Iida, was about to make the honorary welcoming speech.

And you were fashionably late.

Now fully dressed despite being a little rough around the edges from your rush through the city from Idaten's agency, you ran with large strides towards Gym Gamma, thankful that you had quickly asked the security guards by the gates the general direction towards the auditorium. You ignored the confused looks of students who were leaving the premises, heaving heavily again until you spotted the fairy lights that decorated the paths.

You chuckled brightly, rekindling some hope that maybe you made it just in time. Perhaps they stalled for a moment, like how cinemas ran advertisements before the commencement of the movie. Maybe they were still mingling about, something you can easily just slip into without anyone knowing the wiser. There were many ways this would end, but surely, once you reached the open doors of the auditorium, you rounded the corner abruptly.

"And safe!" you yelled, suddenly catching wind of the echo of your voice that blasted in the very silent auditorium.

The awkwardness felt so thick that you could potentially slice it with a knife, finding that all eyes were on you by the doors. You slowly peeked into the large room, your eyes immediately drawn towards the podium set up for the night where the two MCs stood - one a voluptuous dark-haired beauty with hair you wished was your own, and the other, your boss, mouth slightly agape while he eyeballed you through his glasses. You cringed at the scene before you cleared your throat, lightly waving at everybody inside before you slowly walked away from the doors, turning to hide from prying eyes.

You couldn't help a groan escape from your throat, head heavy, wondering if that was the exhaustion catching up to you from your rush to get here, or the embarrassment of possibly interrupting the party. Still, you overheard the MCs continue on with their speech, listening into their anecdotes over the course of their school years. It was pleasant to imagine how they coloured their experiences while you leaned against the wall, smiling, listening intently to Iida's regimental tone.

----

Eventually the rising volume of voices and chatter was your queue to enter into the auditorium, less rowdy and out-of-breath than you were earlier. Your eyes darted around in search for Iida, but quickly found your way towards the flurry of tables when a green-haired gentleman called you over - quickly realising it was the Number One Hero, Deku. Your heart skipped inside your ribcage, but you attempted to keep a cool facade, welcomed by the table of Heroes while they led you to your seat right next to Iida's, which was empty.

"Glad you could make it," welcomed the Number One. "We've heard a lot of things about you.."

"Oh, good things I hope?" You questioned nervously.

"Well, I figured your grand entrance was the cherry on top."

That nervousness grew tenfold upon hearing that from the Number One. It only set your mind to wonder what exactly Iida had said about you to others, let alone, and most probably, to all his close friends and classmates.

The churn in your stomach was blatantly difficult to ignore, clutching onto it while you nervously laughed further. "Sorry, I just ran from work to get here. Haven't had a bite to eat since breakfast this morning."

Suddenly, as if by some miracle, a plate appeared in front of you, served with tonight's dinner now lukewarm. The sound of the chair beside you pulled from the table caught your ear until you felt the presence of a large figure sit by your side, his arms crossed in mild frustration.

You knew that judgemental energy anywhere.

"Thanks Tenya," you slowly spoke, eyeing the tall man while he righted his glasses upon the bridge of his nose.

"You're late," he spoke dryly.

"Fashionably."

"Don't start."

"But I was on a roll," you explained with a whine. "I was on the precipice of completing Stage Two!"

"Didn't you call them Phases?"

"Close enough."

"No it isn't. You need to be consistent."

"Is everything all right?" Asked Todoroki, eyeing the both of you next to Midoriya.

"Everything's fine," clarified Iida, clearing his throat in an attempt to redirect the conversation.

"Sorry, I just get excited when I talk about Big Blue," you admitted before you dug into your plate of food.

"Big Blue?" Continued Todoroki, still with an aloof expression despite the question.

"Yeah, she's my baby," you simply replied between gulps of food.

"You named your daughter Big Blue?"

"Uh, Todoroki, I think that's not exactly what they're talking about," clarified Midoriya.

"Big Blue is one of their passion projects back in Idaten's Research and Development," explained Iida with a sigh, eyeing you still gorging on the dinner plate. "It's meant to be used in an emergency, once they've completed the build and preliminary tests."

"It's officially called Belligerent Backup, or BB for short," you emphasized while still trying to be in conversation. "But I like Big Blue better."

Iida pinched the bridge of his nose, exhausted from your high levels of energy and excitement. Aside from the few coffee trips he made to R&D, he hadn't heard much from you coming up to this reunion, cooped up in the workshops at the agency to even take notice of the day and time. He felt lucky that he rescued a plate for you when you surely arrived, seeing as you never made it earlier this evening before doors opened into Gym Gamma.

"You're really passionate about this, huh?" Asked Yaoyoruzu from across the way, recognizing that she was the one that stood next to Iida on stage.

"It's not the act of creating the invention, it's the process and journey along the way that really excites me," you admitted. "Like the one time when I had to test for Tenya's breathing performance, which required having to create a mold of his-"

"Okay that's enough," interrupted Iida, causing a small pout to form on your lips before you finished the rest of your meal.

Despite being close to age, Iida still held rank above you. Of course, being the brother of Tensei Iida, the man behind the formation of the agency, was a good reason why, but that didn't stop Iida's tendency to check on your health every chance he had. The thought of it brought a smile on your face.

Soon the party was underway, you watched the crowd mingle and dance together on the dance floor, spotting many congregate around some key players. Iida made the rounds with you only for you to trap Cellophane in conversation after he discussed his recent happenstance with a certain thief on his patrols as of late. The thought of upgrading his gear was tantalizing.

"Seriously, you need the latest tech to help you out, and I know just the thing," you quipped excitedly.

"Really?" Asked Sero, curious of your suggestion.

"That my friend would be me!" You piped with thumbs pointing at you. "This thief of yours won't have a chance against any tech I make."

"You're sounding a lot like Hatsume."

"Wait, you know her?"

"We all do. She made most of our tech back when we were students."

Slack-jawed from the epiphany, you turned to Iida next to you, your expression hurt and betrayed. "You didn't tell me this!" You shouted, throwing a finger at Iida.

"I thought it wasn't relevant," he replied dryly.

"I need to know these things. How else do I know who I'm up against previously?"

"It's none of your concern."

"Anyway, it'd be great if you swung by Idaten," you suggested while turning to Sero with a smile. "I can solve your dilemma, or at least give you an upper hand." With a flick of your wrist, you handed Sero a business card, complete with your details and the Idaten insignia emblazoned on its stock. You completely ignored the exasperated sigh from Iida behind you.

"Uh... thanks," mused Sero while he took the card from your hand, spotting his eye towards the dance floor. "It was nice meeting you, but I gotta save a friend, sorry."

"Give me a call!" You shouted after, watching the Tape Hero make his way towards the floor, noticing his intention to help Chargebolt who draped over his plus one.

Your eyes drifted around, feeling the heaviness of sleep weigh on your mind before you decided to recite to yourself what you observed. Earphone Jack, the muso who headed the night's entertainment along with her Hero career, enjoyed a night along with her classmates; Uravity, the caring Gravity Hero who had been rising in rank as of late, conversing with Deku; Tsukuyomi, the dark Hero enjoying the night while chaperoning a friend of his by the looks of it, and then-

"What's the progress on BB?" Asked Iida next to you. Your eyes piqued at his voice, spotting his tall frame now with a serious look.

"Oh? Um, she's coming along," you started. "As you know Phase One was a success, but by my calibrations, she needs to have more injection in her acceleration capacitors. Phase Two should be complete in the next couple of days, give or take, depending on how her balance and suspension perform."

"They're Phases now?" Questioned Iida with a quirked brow.

"They've always been Phases," you beamed with a smile, earning an exasperated sigh from Iida. "Although, it would be wise that we test it on the field. I'd need to know exactly how it would function in a live scenario. Dummies would be ineffective in seeing how it would perform."

Iida spotted the serious look on your face, your mind mulling over the quandaries in your head. "How about you test it with me?" He suggested.

"What? No!" You cried with an outburst. "It's meant to be a surprise!"

"Having anyone else in our agency as volunteers to your projects is unwise," explained Iida. "At least I'm aware of BB's project."

"Yeah but that would destroy any usable data on its effectiveness."

"Call it a control group. You'll need to understand how BB works with someone who knows the weapon before improving its capabilities for someone who doesn't. What fun would there be if you don't continue mastering and finessing?"

You eyed Iida, watching his calm smile on his lips. You couldn't disagree when he was being agreeable.

"Fine, I concede," you spoke dryly. "Would you be available by the end of this week for an hour session?"

"It's a date," he replied, squeezing your shoulder tenderly before he opened his arm to you, inviting you to join him while you stared at this invitation.

"Want to meet more of my friends?" He asked smoothly while you took his arm in yours, standing next to the tall man with a grin.

"Why, I do declare Mr. Iida. You are too kind," you jested with a humorous accent.

"Please don't speak like that when I introduce you."

You only beamed at the man with a toothy smile before being chaperoned throughout the reunion, meeting a very drunk Chargebolt hanging off from his plus one still, a demure Shouto with his infamous Sidekick partner, and bypassing Ground Zero without a hello (and probably for the better). After knowing Iida for years back at the agency, he had opened up a part of his world to you, happy to introduce you to the eyes of Pro-Hero Society a little later than ever.

[holisticpassport]

Why Paris Means So Much More

It’s been a long time since I’ve blogged. Mostly because I got so tired of the constant noise on the internet from everyone screaming ‘look at me, my life is worthy of attention’. I guess I got to the point where I learnt to stop telling everyone how great my life was and just started letting my life speak for itself. I still post photos, but my engagement and care about the social media world has dwindled. But I also realised something else.

  I used to write for other people—for my friends and family to know what was going on in my life. But my focus shifted to knowing that the people who cared the most were already aware  of my movements and checked in consistently. I write in a journal several times a week. The sanctity of privacy has become more valuable.

Having said that, I miss posting diary style posts. The good old days of Tumblr and Blogspot where SEO and affiliate marketing weren’t the goal. When sharing because my heart felt moved to was the point. When I wrote in my authentic voice and didn’t produce content to fit ‘my brand’s voice’.

  I went back home to California and Ohio this year. I hadn’t been back since I got married in 2017, and I had left a whole life in boxes in my mom’s garage. I’ve kept journals a majority of life, as young as eight years old.

  And when I had the opportunity to dive into those boxes, I knew I had very much put away my past and forgotten the little girl who’s dream in life was to be a writer. What constitutes being a writer? Simple: someone who writes.

  If we based it on monetary value/getting paid for what you do, people like Emily Dickenson wouldn’t be classified as a writer, and what a shame that would be. She knew who she was, what she loved, and she did it regardless of whether it brought her money or fame.

  I believe reading diaries to be one of the most incredibly insightful forms of literature, the most famous probably being Anne Frank’s. We dive into the mind of the human experience. A tiny book contains the universe manifested on paper. They capture not only an individuals’ emotions and personal perspective/experience, but depicts history through a lens that only one singular person can convey.

  As an (non professional) anthropologist, it was the most fascinating study to review my own mind and life, my growth and my history as I opened those boxes and pulled out scrap papers, notebooks, lists upon lists, lyrics, essays from high school and college on studying the thing I loved the most: literature.

I discovered a life plan list I had made at 15 (several lists in fact), and all of them included becoming a writer. Truthfully, I had shunned this dream after hearing a boyfriend’s family harshly criticize their cousin for choosing to study English in college, having the same dream as me. I felt shame and embarrassment at having obtained my AA in comparative literature and having nothing to show for in terms of a profession. 

And I wasn’t interested in doing copywriting or hustling to make money from a personal blog documenting my travels. It may not have given me a profession, but at the age of 30 I know what value that degree has given me.

  I was hit with nostalgia and remorse for ever forgetting this passion and this version of myself. Also on my life plan list (and every list I have ever made up to this day) has included one major dream: to spend two-three months in Paris studying the language, art, and having an apartment near the Eiffel Tower WITH A CAT.

  I have had this vision as long as I can remember. My mom got me Eiffel Tower posters, a house warming gift of an Eiffel Tower wine rack, and Parisian charms on a necklace. I took French in high school even though I lived in southern California and definitely sometimes regret not taking Spanish.

  And most recently I’ve discovered, out of everywhere in the world, I have the least amount of French DNA in my body. I am more African than I am French. So why this insane drive and love of francophone culture?

  I think on some spiritual level, I knew this vision was supposed to play a key moment in my life, was supposed to be a part of my story and an overarching theme throughout my journal writing for all of these years.

I went to France six years ago just for a week, but I can easily say it was the best week of my life. Booking a one-way ticket to Paris was a catapult to a journey I had no idea was waiting for me and would find me living on the other side of the planet married to a wonderful man.

  But it wasn’t easy getting there.

  I had the opportunity to go do something similar to my vision in Salzburg when I was offered an au pairing position for two girls for nine months. But I was with a partner who didn’t want me to go. I also turned down a full-ride scholarship to college to stay with him. Ultimately I wanted an unconventional life of travel, and his job was central to LA so we parted ways.

  I was offered another opportunity a few years later to au-pair for a little girl in Paris for six months. I was with a partner who didn’t want me to go. My values remained the same where I wanted a life of travel and felt like I was dragging my partner to want the same as we planned to teach in South Korea, but I knew his heart wasn’t in it and he wanted a cosy life. So we parted ways.

  Cam and I started housesitting in July of 2017. We vowed to spend a year doing this and seeing how we liked it. I loved it, but Cam was averse to so much upheaval and wanted stability/no chaos, and given a bit of tumultuous in his 20’s, it was completely valid.  

But, then came Covid. We spent all of Covid in lockdown in Australia not only within the first three years of our marriage but of our relationship. I found myself reeling as we bud heads on the notion of building a home vs. establishing a lifestyle of travel which was even more impossible because of Covid. I was drowning. It felt like my soul was ripping from the inside out as I thought I found myself in another partnership (this time a bit more permanent), where I felt like the bad guy for knowing intrinsically that I couldn’t be with someone who didn’t have the same values of travel as a lifestyle. I questioned my authentic self and thought maybe I was wrong for wanting these things.

When Covid lifted, Cam and I had a powerful aligning moment of saying to each other that if we didn’t leave now, we never would and we would end up resenting each other. So we sold 80% of our belongings, got a storage unit and first went to Mexico this year, then locked in housesits from April all the way through the rest of the year. We unloaded our storage into a five month sit to pair down even more in preparation for being able to housesit more broadly around the country, not just Melbourne.

  And as we’ve established this life, this chaotic but beautiful journey, I still felt sad. I had all but given up on my dream of going to Paris on my own for two months because what husband would be comfortable with their wife being away for that long? I wanted a partner for so long who would travel with me, and it seemed counterproductive to want to still go to Paris, a romantic, city without my husband.

  So I stopped writing it down in my manifestations journal believing it was never meant to be.

And two weeks later, a housesit on my platform popped up in Paris. An apartment in the 15th Arrondissement near the Eiffel Tower... for two months... with a cat.

  I screenshot it and sent it to Cam as a joke and said ‘I want this with every fibre of my being. What an absolute dream’ thinking nothing really of it other than that I was sure 50 people would apply for it immediately and since I wasn’t even in Europe, I’d never get it anyway.

  Cam’s response: Apply. Can’t hurt to try.

  I paused and thought ‘that’s true, I can just send a message and if I get it, figure out the logistics then.’

  After submitting it, I received a response the next day. I was the first to apply and she wanted to Zoom chat. Two days later, whilst on the zoom chat, she confirmed me for the sit while I was on my anniversary weekend away with Cam in Shepparton, where his and my relationship initially began from that first one-way trip to Paris in 2016.

What has ensued over the last month has been an unfathomable level of shock, courage, fear, and finally excitement. My initial reaction was gut wrenching anxiety to the point I almost thought my intuition was telling me I was going to die on the flight, don’t go. Like THAT much of a nauseating feeling.

  When I spoke to my therapist a week later, a flood work of emotions and tears came out. My brain couldn’t comprehend the scale of this. It couldn’t understand that for the first time, me leaving my partner to travel on my own wouldn’t result in a breakup. Even more fear came up about my worth being tied to my productivity and how I was actually terrified to do ‘nothing’, but just be.

  I’ve been a partner to someone since 12 years old. I have never once lived on my own except for one month in Jervis Bay, and it was the most spiritual, creative, growth-filled time of my life. But it was filled with difficult conversations being away from Cam in our first year of marriage/relationship and not knowing how to navigate separation anxiety.

  I’ve had a lot of financial insecurity in my life losing family homes, parents divorcing, and not leaving bad relationships for years because I felt I didn’t have anywhere else to go because I couldn’t afford it on my own. I have always had to be in survival mode since 15 years old, and it’s taken a massive toll on my health. So to go to Paris and not HAVE to work—to recognize that this didn’t happen all those times before because it was meant to happen at a time in my life when I could financially do it with the unending support of my partner who encouraged me to go—I’m forced to ask the questions:

who am I when my worth isn’t tied to my productivity? Who am I when I’m not in fight or flight mode? Who am I on my own, without a partner to factor in to my every choice and decision on a day to day basis?

  My therapist has made me see that I haven’t allowed myself to truly ‘play’ in many, many years. To sit in a park by myself and read with nowhere else to be and nothing/no one to pull me away. To ask ‘little Veronica’ what she would like to do and is she getting everything she needs. To re-parent myself and tell her she’s safe to play, not to worry about money or work or housing or a partner.

My tax refund covered my flight for the exact amount. I sold my camera, and Cam and I worked nearly seven days a week the last month to fund my trip with ample wiggle room. If I was single, I’m sure at some point I could have saved enough on my own to go to Paris. But knowing that my partner fully supports me—after so many times putting my dream on hold for men who wouldn’t do the same for me—I’m so insanely grateful.

  And our communication has gone from strength to strength with honesty, recognizing triggers and approaching with curiosity instead of defensiveness, holding space for all the emotions that came up for both of us in me taking this trip, discussing fears at length... all I can say is holy shit, don’t ever settle for a boy, get yourself a man.

  When I’ve told people over the last month that I’m going to Paris, they’re reaction is of course jealously and they say, “oh so you’re just going on holiday”. But it’s sooooo much more than that. There’s so much history behind it... my history. And I plan to write about this experience so that if someday my diaries are ever published long after I’m gone, maybe it’ll inspire someone. That’s all I ever aim to do in this life, is just inspire people to go after every single dream they have an never compromise on your authenticity and truth.

  To tick off this trip will be to complete a bucket list I made 22 years ago. And in doing so, it revives and allows that version of me to integrate into the woman and person I am becoming—with new goals and dreams to achieve that I am already creating with my partner. This season of life is nothing short of profound bliss.

[littlelasagne]

Heyo!!! 🤩🤩🤩

🌐 📝🐷

🌐 Languages you can speak and/or are learning. Which are you fluent in

Currently only english. As a child, tamil, but now i only understand a little. Learnt french and german in school for years but yh, forgotten :(

📝 Fave quote

"Life before death, strength before weakness, journey before destination."

From The Way of Kings by Sanderson

Also like, every famous lotr quote 😊

🐷 Junk food you can never get enough of

MCDONALDSSSS

Just woke up, now i want some 🤪😭

[chicoriii]

Season 4, Episode 2 - Mensonge (Lies)

Welcome again. I had been logged out from Tumblr for the whole weekend, because I was afraid of untagged spoilers, as I've seen one screenshot here accidentally, fortunately it wasn't spoilerish. And I've watched the Lies today. Again without reading other's people opinion about the episode, so I probably write things that have been said before.

I enjoyed it more than Truth. But not because it's better written, I think the overall quality of both is similar. Lies is about characters I care about more, so it's natural that the episode is automatically more interesting to me. I dislike both Luka and Jagged (to be fair the only member of the Couffaine family I like is Juleka) and that would be hard to make me caring about them, the best thing I could say about any of those characters is that I tolerate them on screen. Sometimes. Don't get me wrong, Truth was the best episode for Luka and Jagged, but they are still dull and/or annoying to me. Creators need to develop son-father relationship more to make me interested in it, that arc was too shallow in Truth.

But the post is about Adrigami episode, not Lukanette one.

I'm surprised that we got only one not very long scene with civilian Marinette. But not surprised that she's still pining over Adrien. Just like Chat is pining over Ladybug. As I'm keeping saying, it's not gonna change. But really, Marinette thinks that Adrien's life is perfect? She should know that tight schedule could be a big problem and has she forgotten what terrible father is Gabriel? Of course she doesn't know details we know, but she should be aware that he isn't as good parent like her own. So probably her enamored brain can't see bad sides of life of her loved one. She still can't think rational when it comes to him. Another reason why she should stop putting him on a pedestal. We need some friendly Adrienette so badly, we need to see Adrien telling her more bad things in his life. He isn't used to complain, but I think he needs to tell someone the truth about his family life. I hope Marinette will be that person.

I had been tired of clown Chat in Truth, but this episode lets us to see the situation from his point of view and now I understand more why he behaves like that. I think that he tries to hide from Ladybug how much he miss spending time with her that way. He is aware that's because of her new responsibility and he doesn't want to make her feel bad for it. Those scenes were so sweet. How much Chat wants an Akuma to appear just to see his lady. Not very noble, but I can't blame him. It only shows that Adrien is a normal human being. We all are selfish from time to time and it's healthy (you only have to find a good balance, being as selfish as Chloé and as selfless as Luka is not good).

Geez, why they can't put the right title of the piece? That's a different composition than that one used back in season 2, but the smartphone's screen says the same. And none of them is actually Raindrop Prelude. This is Raindrop Prelude. They are not even any of Chopin's preludes. I won't be surprised if both are not Fryderyk Chopin's compositions either (although I haven't heard all the solo piano pieces composed by him, so I can't be sure). I love classical music, so I'd love to know what pieces Adrien's playing! By the way, I recommend to listen to all of the 24 preludes, they are usually very short but interesting compositions. If you're too lazy to listen to all, check out number 20 at least, that's a pure, very atmospheric, beauty. One of my favourites melodies ever created.

I have always thought that Adrigami has more chemistry and it's generally more entertaining to watch than Lukanette (sorry stans, but you probably don't even follow me and read my posts,  there's a reason why I'm warning that my blog is not Luka and Lukanette friendly in its description). I feel that in this episode as well. Absolutely it's not a perfect relationship and it can't be, as Adrien is still into Ladybug. It's clear that Kagami is the one who really cares, Adrien is more distant. It seems that he's abashed of Kagami's physical intimacy, like he can't be open to her when he's still in love with Ladybug. That was really sad to hear Kagami's words that she's lying to be more often with him and he lies to not spend time with her. But relationship can't work if only one side is invested in it and they both need to learn it. They have some things in common, I like how they spending time together, so I'm sure they would work much better as friends. I'm sorry for Kagami and I wish her a better boyfriend who would love her truly. In some way it was a repeat of Truth, as we've seen Adrien leaving Kagami all of sudden, because of Akuma's attacks, but this time it's not as heavily portrayed like it's not working only because of superhero responsibility, that I didn't like in the previous episode. Another reason why I liked how Adrigami is shown more.

I really, really loved that we've learnt something new about Kagami and that's amazing it's something I have in common with her. I'm really surprised, since she didn't seem to have an artistic soul before. I also love seeing she likes draw animals, it's like me, I'm trying practise it. I enjoy drawing animals (and creatures like Kwamis or Pokémon) more than humans. But at the same time I feel angry at her mother. How could she dare to say that Kagami isn't good enough? Trying to kill a child's hobby is always unforgivable. She's much better than me (I'm a little jealous, but that's not the first time when a teen has much better skill than me), but my family and some others I know in real life often say that I'm talented and some people try to convince me to take pay commissions. That’s me who knows the best than I'm not skilled enough to take money for my art (they don't know really good artists in person and they don’t draw themselves, so no wonder they are not aware that my works aren't that good they think). Maybe some day, but not now, so I only enjoy drawing gifts for others. I'm also got interested in a real French artist she mentioned - Henri de Toulouse-Lautrec and I've seen some of his works. Very good for Miraculous for mentioning artist like him, I have never heard about him before, but maybe French students learn about him in school.

Seeing Adrien making Chat's pose was hilarious. I'm sure it's food for true selves trope supporters, but I also agree with Kagami that both model poses and Chat's poses are not ALL Adrien poses. He's more than that. That seemed like he has problems with being natural when he's on the pressure. He's learned how to make model poses, but I also think that when he is in full clown mode is also an act. But that's a mask which he has putted all by himself. In which he tries to be as much different than his public image as he can. Of course being dorky is also a true Adrien side, but not all the time. Being just a cute and polite boy is also true him. It seems that Adrien is not aware of it.

Marinette's lucky charm bracelet is an akumatised object once more. That and the fact she was asking him what he was doing on the boat tell us that Kagami probably think that Adrien is in love with Marinette (it could make also her wonder what stop them from being together if she knows that Marinette likes him as well).

I also liked her reaction to imminent breaking up more. It's more human reaction in my opinion. Some anger, but not too much. She says she doesn't want to see him for a while and that's completely understandable. Adrien has broken her heart, so she need some time to take care of herself without being interrupted by him. I'm going to say something that could be seen controversial, but in my opinion her attitude is way more healthy than Luka's. He still waits for a girl who clearly likes another boy much, but she's trying to really give up on him. And I would like to see a scene in which she says him that Marinette is not worth his waiting, he should be open for another love instead. Uff, I was really worried that they might kill Adrien and Kagami characters. But nothing really bad happened in the episode between them, everything was in-character. Of course salters will still find reasons to hate Kagami, they can say she's possessive towards him (that's true to some extent, but I think it's not really toxic, as she's still cares about his true feelings).

I need to say that Lies is the worst S4 Akuma design we've seen till now. Riposte and Oni-chan were much better. Also the battle was the worst part of this episode in my opinion. It wasn't completely bad, but it felt somewhat boring to me. I definitely enjoyed fights against Truth and Furious Fu more. The thing about that I liked the most what how they made use of Fang.

So the season 4 version of Chat Noir's transformation theme is exactly the same they used in the Shanghai special. It wasn't obvious, since Ladybug's one is a different one than that in the show. I noticed that that Ladybug's theme feels more like a new composition which only uses parts of an original version, while Chat's is clearly "just" an arrangement of the theme we know since season 1. Maybe that's because it's supposed to symbolise that she has even more responsibility now, as she's the Guardian as well. Chat's role hasn't changed that much as hers. I also think the new arrangement sounds cooler, it's more electric guitar-driven. I can't wait to get any of the episodes in which there's his transformation sequence with 5.1 audio to rip it.

All three released episodes are nice for Ladynoir a lot, their scenes are all sweet and wholesome. It almost feel like Ladynoir is close to happen. But I feel that's just calm before the storm. Marinette hasn't reached to her worst moment yet. I'm sure Ladybug will have more breakdowns like that in the season 3 finale.

Three episodes aired and I'm not amazed by any of them. But I don't want to be salty, I'm not worried about that. That's true for season 3 as well, I enjoy the second part of the season more as well. It's important to save the best episodes for later. And I have never expected that I would love all the S4 episodes, despite of pre-release statements, it's impossible. I'm not disappointed. Yet. Just give me some Adrienette food. Please.

[awrldalone]

27th April 2021, 3.26pm

Today was special. It started off upsettingly, because usually I wake up very early - between six and twenty past six - but today my alarm did not go off, or I ignored it. And no one woke me up until one hour later.

I wonder how they did not realise. Usually I’m leaving when they wake all up, yet today they did not notice anything different. It made me feel ghostly. My father felt bad about it, and offered to give me a lift to Venice. In the car, which smelled like leather, like always, I asked him why he did not wake me up - and he said it was because he thought I was doing online school.

How he thought that is a mystery to me, after all I assumed we all lived in the same house. Again, I felt like a ghost.

And like a ghost I walked to school. I stopped to get a cappuccino. The man over the counter recognised me from yesterday, he was with who I assume was his wife.

I still got to school early. First two periods I had Italian Literature, but from 9 to 12 I was excused from classes because I was taking the yearbook photos.

It’s not common here to put together a yearbook, but two years ago the student council had the idea. Last year, because of Covid, we did not do it, but this year the student representatives - two of which are in my class - keenly brought up the idea. We could not hire a photographer, so today I acted like one.

Yesterday night I was scared. Imposter syndrome has the best of me because I’m not that good at taking photos, and I’m always scared people will be disappointed.

I brought two lenses, but ultimately I only used the portrait one. I took a portrait of each person, then a group photo with the whole class, then various photos of various subgroups. It was fun, but exhausting.

It made me think that, after all, I care incredibly about my appearance. While I was telling every person I photographed that they looked great, that they are photogenic, or that the photo turned out perfect, I was thinking about how I was seeing at least half of the school.

They know my name. They know who I am. It’s scary. The idea of me living in people’s heads - it probably will disappear like an aspirin, fizzle out quickly, but what if it sticks, and grows outside of my control, in their psyche? It’s scary.

I hope they thought my clothes were cool, because I really liked my clothes. I bought a used leather blazer/coat, and I think it looks more than cool.

At 12, B. and I returned to class. French class, two periods, test. It was an analysis on Mémoires d'outre-tombe, by François-René de Chateaubriand. I think it went well, content-wise. I’m a little less sure about the language. When i reread my first answer I noticed that, embarrassingly, I had used the third person plural for every singular subject.

Perhaps I should study more. I really should. Yesterday I completely and utterly fucked up my History average because I left blank one full question. I had forgotten to study that specific topic. I had written down a note in the text book that I did not have to study the Sister Republics, and she asked exactly that. I should have studied everything. I hope I’ll get a chance to do better, because I probably failed this test.

Now I’m in the bus. I hate the smell of people, the warmth of oppressing breaths, tired from work. I left school early because I need to finish a group assignment. Honestly, I like group assignments only when I’m not in a group with strong minded people.

I was paired up with E. and D. They both are very strong-willed, they like having everything in their hands. E. is a professional fencer, we are probably going to Paris together this summer. She’s very competitive. D. is very precise, inquisitive, controlling. But I like having control, telling people what to do. In a team, I have learnt how to lead. It’s the easiest task, and the most rewarding. The type of tiredness that comes after a lot of work is satisfactory.

-c.

[omoi-no-hoka]

Hi omoi-no-hoka in a previous ask you said that you had studied german besides Japanese in uni, but i dont recall reading that you said that you got to any level of proficiency,so have you learnt another language to some degree?(including German), or are you interested in learning another?

Hi there, my dear friend! 💖

I have dabbled in several languages, but I can only claim to be proficient in English and Japanese right now.

Here are the languages I have studied so far:

English

Proficiency: Native

I can muddle my way through Middle English if you force me, but I’d rather you didn’t lol. I did quite a bit of study of medieval literature and the history of the English language, so I’m fairly good at Chaucer and Milton and stuff, if I reeeeeeally need to be. I was one of those nerds that participated in the university’s Medieval Poetry Reading Club lol. For genealogy research I often find myself reading documents from the 17th century and  back which is...oof. that calligraphy and spelling, man.  

Japanese

Length of Study: 5 years at uni plus all these years of independent study

Proficiency: near-native (feel kinda like a braggart for writing that...)

I can do Classical Japanese as well but it is torture I do not want inflicted upon me, unless it is Basho’s haiku.

Spanish

Length of Study: 4 years in high school, 1 year in uni

Proficiency: I was fully conversational back in uni. Went to Mexico and totally survived. Could watch telenovelas to my heart’s content. Sadly, I have had zero opportunity to use Spanish since moving to Japan 6 years ago and I have forgotten most all of it... I can still read it very well,  but when I try to speak it, Japanese words come out and it’s very stop-and-start. It makes me so sad I could cry, because I just love Spanish so much. I want to refresh, but I need a speaking partner to really get back to being fluent again.

French

Length of Study: 2 years in high school

Proficiency: ...how do you say “zero” in French? lol. Strangely, I know how to say “canker sore,” which is “aphtes.” This is because one of my roommates in the dorms at uni only knew the French word, and therefore I learned the French word lol. Thank you for teaching me that word, mon amie! XD

German

Length of Study: 1 year in uni

Proficiency: All I can say is “Das ist nicht so gut” and “Krankenwagen.” So...zero lol. I have a lot of German heritage, so I would love to study it in earnest one day. The whole der/die/das and preposition mess kills me though. 

Indonesian

Length of Study: 6 months, independent

Proficiency: My host parents wanted to take their first ever trip abroad and chose Indonesia, where we have a great English-speaking friend living in a rural part of East Java. Since my host parents can’t speak English, they wanted me to come with them. So I did my best to learn as much Indonesian as possible in the 6 months leading up to the trip. I was able to count, talk about money, do greetings, all the really rudimentary crash-course survival stuff. Also, “tumbicar” is how you say “pottery” lol.

I also learned a little bit of Javanese, because our friend’s family could only speak Javanese, so I learned how to say “Thank you” and a few other little phrases.

I intend to go back and visit his family again, so I really need to study Javanese seriously. However, the only legit book on Javanese I could find assumes that you already speak Indonesian, so...gotta learn Indonesian first lol.

Romanian

Length of Study: 3 months, independent

Proficiency: Zero. A story I was writing involved some bits of spoken Romanian and I wanted to understand the grammar more so I could check whether Google Translate was doing me dirty. It was really cool and I’d love to study it seriously one day.

Old English

Length of Study: Ongoing!!

Proficiency: Zero right now, but I just started studying it and I. AM. SO. EXCITED.

Other Languages I’d like to study:

Ainu

Old Norse

ARABIC. That’s at the top of my list, because I have very very serious plans to go to Egypt in the next couple years, and it’s a fascinating language.

Mongolian is another one that really interests me. Not sure how I’d go about learning it, though.

[soimarriedayuki]

Self Invited Guest

Our family dynamic is a fairly simple one. There is naturally the In-laws who are close but not too close. This is the us that is Yuki, Myself and Tiny and then there is the rest of the family who are my family. 

A lot of my family actually live a lot further away so I don’t in fact see them much at all. My Mother on the other hand still lives locally. A blessing you might say as she adore Tiny and is very helpful. 

Then this happens... Don’t worry I have not forgotten this blog is actually something to do with my husband more than a random diary. He does make an appearance.

---

In the middle of cleaning the bathroom I hear the front door open followed by a familiar shout out of “It’s me!” 

You have no idea the struggle it is to suppress replying “Hello Me!” Instead I scoop up the cream cleaner and bleach and go to check out what is happening.

Turns out it was a simple task that required me using our printer to make copies of some paperwork. Quick, easy and after handing them over I was trying to think about what my next household task was to be. 

I try to do as much of the cleaning as possible while Tiny is in school. I know it is never going to stop the requirement of cleaning house but at least when she isn’t here I can focus on the laundry and cleaning that uses all those cleaning bottles that come with warnings on them. And the child proof lids that you personally struggle to open but if you give them to most children can apparently be opened very easily. *Note* I do not ever do this i was attempting to be funny. 

"So what we having for lunch?" Mum settles down on the sofa looking like she is certainly not moving anytime soon. I can already feel the plans to be ahead on the chores flying away from me.

"Is this the royal we or are you asking me to feed you?"

"Well i'm here." She looks at me completely oblivious to the way i’m feeling. Or maybe she knows and is just playing... difficult to tell I mean she is my Mum after all. 

"You invited yourself. I don't even know what i have..."  

 Honestly i don’t mind caring for others and I do try to be a good host. Usually I don’t tend to play host to a self invited guest.

"Anything is fine. Oh but i can't have..."

I leave the room as she starts to list of things she can and can't have since her operation and vanish into the kitchen. Whilst i would love to meet all her demands I start looking at the few items i did actually have since going to the stores to restock supplies was still hit and miss.

I swear if you listen very carefully you can probably hear my brain quietly scream as i look around the items i actually do have before settling on a "basic" French-ish slightly fusion menu plan. 

___

Menu 

*Soft fresh baguette sandwich with grated iceberg lettuce, sliced apple and slices of french brie drizzled in a vinaigrette dressing. 

*Tender leaf salad with chunks of Apple, Chorizo and goat's cheese in more of the same french dressing. Much more dressing than what i put on the baguettes because you know? its a salad bowl.

*A smooth thick carrot and lentil soup with cut up and toasted croissants for croutons with some sour cream. 

___ 

"What's this?" Mum asks as I start placing plates on the table.

"Well no expert here Mum but i do believe it is what people call food." I open up a bottle of sparkling water and put that on the table with the cutlery.

"It looks edible!" She sits down and starts looking at the food as if she was expecting it to move or something.

I don’t have a problem generally with cooking. I have in fact been told i can turn out some pretty passable dishes and even been asked for a recipe or two. I do have to say i find the candid reaction from my own mother to be amusing.

"My food always looks edible unlike a certain someone who was in the habit of serving various shades of charcoal or just food that arrived after a ping noise" If i haven’t told you already I do actually love my Mum. I was however infected with a sass bug as a child and i am still suffering it to this day. 

"You survived didn't you!?" She mocks being seriously offended knowing full well i’m teasing. 

 "Yes you are right i also learnt to cook. Bon appetite." 

While we are eating this is where Yuki appears. I did tell you he was here somewhere didn’t I? Dragging his feet as he shuffled into the kitchen to get a drink looking for all the world like he might actually be a zombie.

He cracks the pull tab on the can in his hands and takes what looks like an endless mouthful of fizzy pop. Soda, Pop, soft drink... you chose your own name for it here as we are inclined to just refer to it as juice sometimes.

“What’s this opening up a cafe? Hey Mum.”

I smiled seeing him do a classic move of addressing someone when they had their mouths full. He usually waits till I have just taken a mouthful of something to drink before saying something either witty or dumb and it makes me laugh and choke. 

"You hungry too?" I ask knowing there is nothing actually on the table except maybe the soup that he would in fact choose to eat.

I would have made him something different if he asked for food, i’m not that cruel.

"Nope I be sleepy. I was thirsty but I got soda so i'm going back to bed." He gives a half hearted wave of his hand as he leaves after tossing the now empty can in the recycling. 

He’s a night shift worker and while i am aware his drinking habits may not be the healthiest I won’t condone them. Well not yet anyway, to be hones i’m a little tired of telling him to not drink coke and then go back to bed.

"Good bye creature formally known as Thirsty" I go back to eating my lunch when i catch the muttering voice of my dear mother.

“You two are so weird.” 

I smile ignoring it as i could hardly argue differently.

---

[bensakindofmagic]

IT’S ANOTHER BEN HARDY FANFIC (pls read it) Ben Hardy x female reader WARNINGS: talking about sex/toys/drugs - also there will be swearing throughout, I’ll try to warn you before each chapter but some might slip through w/c: 1.5k+ A/N: it’s kinda short cause it’s the first chapter and we’re setting everything up, also pls note that I have no idea how an actual film set operates so reader is a Cast PA but I’ve made up her job a bit, pls be nice to me I hope you like it :)

Chapter One “Okay, let’s do one more run through of Hammer to Fall and then we’ll break for lunch,” you heard the call from the side of the makeshift stage. It was the first week of your new job, day four of rehearsals for Live Aid, and you already felt like you were getting your ass kicked. After a few years on the film circuit as a runner and low level AD, you had lucked out and landed a job as Cast PA on the new Queen film, Bohemian Rhapsody. Being a huge Queen fan, you had accepted the job in a heartbeat, but it being your first time working directly with the cast, you were pretty nervous. Being Cast PA meant you worked with the main talent personally, making sure they were where they needed to be when they needed to be there, acted as a liaison between them and production, and generally fulfilled any requests that they might have for the duration of the shoot. The hours were gruelling, which you were used to from previous jobs, but that, paired with the increased pressure and inexperience, had you running around frantically all hours of the day, usually trying to fix some mistake (which frustratingly often wasn’t yours). The upside was that the cast were all lovely; no divas, no assholes. You’d told them from the off that you were new to the job, and they were patient and kind, even helping you out here and there. Joe, the guy playing the bassist, was particularly sweet. He’d been on film sets for most of his life - he was the kid in Jurassic Park, you had learned much to your excitement - so was more than used to the environment. He reminded you what the abbreviations stood for when your mind went blank, and always met your eyes with a smile when he caught you looking stressed. Gwilym and Rami were lovely too - and seeing the first glimpses of his performance as Freddie blew your mind - as were Lucy, Allen when you’d met them before the principle photography started, and the whole cast. Well, almost the whole cast. It was that Ben Hardy; you knew he was going to be trouble the moment you laid eyes on him. He was far too pretty for your liking, with eyes like forrest pools, deep and warm and inviting, and plump lips that always seemed to be hiding a smirk. The first time you shook his hand you had to tear your eyes away from the rippling muscles in his arm, barely covered by a tshirt. You could tell that keeping yourself from crushing on him would be a challenge, but we all have to make sacrifices now and again. You had decided long ago that you would never jeopardise your career over a guy, so as far as you were concerned, all four of them were out of bounds. You watched the guys from the wings; it was just a rehearsal so they were all in their own clothes, no one had the hair on, and it was a little bit ropey, let’s not beat around the bush. They were each so focused on their own performances, getting every detail right, they it seemed a little isolated, disjointed. But you saw how much potential they had, and the thrill of what this project would become was most of the reason you managed the twat-o’clock-in-the-morning starts. They seemed to swell, each getting into his own performance, and you saw that they could build to become more than the sum of their parts. Rami was prancing about like he owned the stage, Gwilym concentrating so hard on getting the guitar solo right, Joe was killing it with the Deacy two-step, and Ben, shredding those drums, veins bulging, open-mouthed, wisps of hair sticking to his sweaty forehead… Let’s not get distracted now, you’re at work. “Nice work guys, that’s lunch.” After returning their props and instruments the guys came tumbling off stage towards you, and you started leading them towards the canteen. “So Y/N, what did you think? We look okay?” asked Gwilym once you were all sat down with your food. “Mhm it was great,” you mumbled, a little more interested in your spaghetti bolognese - you were starving. Rami chuckled, “You sound unenthused.” “No really, I mean obviously it needs a bit of practice but that’s what rehearsals are for right?” “Oh no please, Y/N,” Ben said with light sarcasm, “tell us what you really think.” You smiled, trying not to blush. “I guess you just don’t quite feel like a band. It’s probably just because you didn’t know each other that well yet, but that’ll get there. I could sort out some bonding time if you like?” “What, like group puzzles and trust exercises?” he scoffed. “I was thinking more along the lines of getting hammered and playing drinking games, but whatever floats your boat,” you sassed. Given that you were met with satisfied grins and nods of approval, you figured they were in.

The five of you were sat in a circle on the floor, a shot glass in front of each person and a bottle of tequila in the middle. You filled up each glass, spilling a little on the way from the pints you’d already had. “Okay, this is a ‘getting to know you’ exercise,” you said, trying to hide that you were stumbling over your words a little, “so I want personal questions. And you have to be honest! If I think you’re lying you have to take a shot, okay?” “I feel like I’m 16 again at a house party cause someone parents are out of town”, Ben sniggered. Ignoring him, you decided to kick things off. “We’ll start with a classic - never have I ever joined the mile high club.” Joe drank, much to the delight of the other guys. “What? It was with an air-hostess, she was hot. I wasn’t gonna pass up the chance to fulfil a schoolboy fantasy.” You grinned, this was going to be fun. Rami shifted excitedly and piped up, “Okay me next, me next. Never have I ever slept with someone of a different nationality to me.” Gwil drank and told the story of a summer fling with a French girl he met on a school exchange. You also drank. “I lived in Italy for a year after uni,” you explained as you refilled your glass, “and you best believe to got that Italian dick. They know what they’re doing over there.” You were vaguely aware of Ben blushing. “I didn’t know you lived in Italy, Y/N,” Gwil said. “Well then, it would appear that the game is working. And by the way, just to clarify, it’s not a requirement that the questions be sex related,” you chuckled. Gwil cleared his throat, “Never have I ever been to a gay bar.” Again you drank, and Rami too. “Gay bars are the best, they’re so much fun!” he exclaimed. “You guys are missing out.” The game continued in much the same fashion, with the majority of questions being about the bedroom. You learnt more about their sex lives than you did about anything else. It was Joe’s turn, and after some thought he said, “Never have I ever used toys in the bedroom.” You cocked an eyebrow when Ben brought his glass to his lips, as you did the same. He shrugged, “I’ve been in a relationship for a long time, you have to spice things up every now and again.” Your heart fell a little when he said he was in a relationship, long-term at that. Well anyway that settles it, you thought to yourself, you can’t fancy him, he has a girlfriend. You just hoped that your face didn’t betray your disappointment. “What’s your justification Y/N?” Joe asked. “What?”
“Sex toys,” he clarified. Your face collapsed into a look of disbelief, “Do I need to justify it? They’re fun, enough said.” The guys laughed and said they’d take your word for it, to which you rolled your eyes, but you thought you noticed a hunger on Ben’s face. You couldn’t look away as he pulled his bottom lip through his teeth. You pushed the image from your mind as Gwil said,”Never have I ever smoked weed.” “What, never?!” Joe hollered in disbelief, as you all drank your shot. The more you drank the more outrageous the questions got - “never have I ever used a whip”, “never have I ever had actual sex on the beach”, “never have I ever thought about someone I know personally while masturbating”- and before long you were all plastered. At points the game got half forgotten as you all fell about into fits of giggles. In your drunkenness you kept staring at Ben, noticing the way he wet his lips, or how deep and velvety his voice was when he laughed, or how his whole face seemed to lift when he smiled widely, how it added depth to his features. He was just so pretty… But when someone said they’d never had a crush on a colleague you steadfastly refused to drink. You categorically did not have a crush on Ben Hardy. Absolutely not.

[mcatra]

Oh my god they were lab partners pt. 2/2

part one

A03 LINK

Highschool AU fic of Hordak and Entrapta becoming lab partners. Hordak may have accidentally fallen in love with her somewhere along the way. 

Hordak's never liked anyone before in his entire life. Not even as friends. So whatever this was? Completely out of his depth. 

There was no stopping it- these feelings. It was insane how much her name plagued his thoughts in random places at all times of the day. These symptoms formed in unexpected ways, like how he had thought he was having a heart attack, when really all that happened was that Entrapta smiled at him. Or how his face would heat up and his hands would involuntarily go clammy when she would drag him by the hand to go somewhere. 

Hordak had even learnt how to braid. He had gotten pretty good at it too, if the complicated french braids and buns Entrapta was sporting before lab now was of any indication.

It didn't matter though, since she obviously didn't feel the same. She's had dozens of friends before, and he was just one of them. But Entrapta was his first friend- but he's already screwed that up. It's taken him this long to find someone that he can actually tolerate the presence of, and it seemed fate was determined to take that away as well. 

So he crushes the feelings deep inside, though they threaten to spill out every few minutes when he's with her. He's fine with being friends, really. 

The school holidays was starting, which would give him plenty of time to get over his feelings. 

This plan is immediately compromised when Entrapta insists on texting him several times a day. 

Entrapta:

yakult is the perfect size of drink but it's not fizzy!! (〒﹏〒)

Hordak: 

Perhaps you should try packaging your drinks in smaller sized Yakult bottles. 

Entrapta: 

:00 yea ur right!! I'll ask my butler to do that be righttt baackkk 

Hordak: 

A butler? 

Entrapta: 

yep my parents r always busy working!! Soda pop makes the best lunches ヾ(´ ▽ ` ) 

[image.attachment] 

It's a photo of what seems to be her lunch, bite sized cookies, scones, and of course pink fizzy lemonade in a tiny bottle. 

Looking at it, he thinks it's only customary to send a photo of his own lunch.  

Hordak: [image.attachment] 

Entrapta: ???????‽‽ Σ(°△°|||)︴ 

Entrapta: NOO9OOOOOO what is THAT ??!!!  

He's confused by her response. It was all that Prime stacked their food cupboards with, he didn't see anything wrong about his grey ration bars. It wasn't even the brown kind today. 

Hordak: That is my lunch. 

Entrapta: (ಥ﹏ಥ) I'm so sorry hordak… 

pleaseeee let me come over and deliver U some of my food!!! 

He wishes she would, but he can't afford letting Prime see her. There's a reason why he's dodged every request from her to come over. 

Hordak: Thank you for your consideration, but that won't be necessary. It gives me enough nutrition for the day. 

Entrapta: FINEE but when we get back I'm giving you all the food U can eat!!! I'll even make them big!! Just for you!! 

Hordak: I look forward to it. 

Entrapta: (≧▽≦) ♥️  

Did...Did she just send a heart? What did that mean?

He stares at the screen in disbelief. Every time he thinks he's doing well she sends his mind into overdrive. 

Scratch that, what was he supposed to send back? 

He falters on a response, anxiously trying to decide one before she got suspicious and asked him why he was taking so long. A solid 5 minutes later, he finally settles on one. 

Hordak:  :]

---

...

[Incoming video call from Entrapta]

He bolts upright in bed, hair in disarray. 

The clock reads 1am. What was she doing calling at this hour? He scrambles to lower the volume, unlocking it in the process, and when he does Entrapta's face fills the screen. 

She's in her pajamas, her hair tied up haphazardly into a messy bun on the top of her head. It seemed like she had attempted to recreate the neatly tucked bun that Hordak always did for her, but couldn't quite figure it out. 

'Hordak! I've just made the most fascinating discovery- oh sorry, were you sleeping?' 

'Ah, no. I wasn't.' He fibs, not wanting her to hang up. He didn't want to admit it, but he missed seeing her face. 'Do go on.' 

She digs through a stack of letters, and brings it up triumphantly to the screen. 

'I've found some scholarship offers buried in my junk mail!' She chirps through the pixelated video feed.

'Got one from California Institute of Technology, Harvard and MIT! They loved my research papers and scientific breakthroughs!' 

He blinks in shock. That was huge. 

'Congratulations!' He bursts out- those are incredible opportunities. ‘Which one will you be attending?' 

'Oh, that's why I called! I needed help deciding. So I was wondering…' She looked oddly nervous, tapping two fingers together. 'Which university would you be going to?' 

Hordak hadn't even applied to any university, let alone receiving offers from Ivy League schools. It had been decided since he was a kid that he would be working for Prime's company right after graduation. He hadn't considered any other alternative before. 

'I…have not applied to any yet.' 

'What?!’ She cries out, appalled. ‘You should definitely apply! You have more knowledge of cosmic forms than I do, Hordak. Plus your grades have improved exponentially this year- I even made a graph!' 

Before he can ask why on earth she had made a graph of his grades she brings out a spreadsheet of his progress. 

'According to the numbers you can definitely apply to any of the surrounding schools in the area! Oh but how fun would it be if we could go to the same university?!' 

'I can't possibly afford the tuition-' 

'Bank loans, and you can work part time! You could even apply for financial assistance. Please come.' 

Hordak hesitates, looking at the door behind him. Imp was stirring in the room next door. He lowers his voice. 

'I.. I...'

He starts and aborts a few sentences. He clenches his scarred arm unconsciously. Of course he wants to. But he had responsibilities that weighed heavily on his shoulders, and circumstances that a carefree sheltered girl couldn't even comprehend. No amount of optimism or daydreaming could fix his grim reality. 

 'I can't.' Is all he manages to say.

She looks slightly taken aback, and he can see her trying not to look disappointed.  

'..That's okay. I understand.'

A horrible sense of guilt spreads in his stomach. Entrapta changes the topic and they don't bring up the subject again.

---

Entrapta has always had trouble making friends. People usually ignored her when she talked about her interests, or were telling her what she did wrong. Usually it was a missed social cue, or she had used words that were too technical for them to understand. 

Hordak was different though. He always listened, understood her technical jargon and offered his own knowledge that sometimes even outweighed her own. She had been curious about this elusive person that everyone was afraid of since she had met him behind the bathroom block. He didn’t seem like the vicious animal that the rumours made him out to be. So on a whim, she had volunteered to be his lab partner.

At first she was just ecstatic to find someone who liked the same things she did, but soon it was more than just the shared love for science. Entrapta had thought for years that the only way she could make friends was allowing them to copy and take her work, but Hordak had showed her otherwise. A shared solidarity for two outcasts. 

Even though he showed a tough angry exterior to everyone, with her Hordak was surprisingly kind. 

He always did little things for her without prompting. Once she had forgotten to bring her jacket when it was cold and he had wordlessly handed his over for her to wear. Or how he noticed when she hadn't slept that night and bought her an iced coffee from the vending machine. He had even poured it into the lid in an effort to make it the way she liked it. 

She began to notice things about him as well, like how he got embarrassed easily, or how despite his old demeanor he could be surprisingly childish. His reactions became even more fascinating than her experiments. Entrapta catalogued them in her mind, keeping track of the emotions he would show. He was always so stoic, the primary emotion being anger or quiet indifference. A few smiles here and there, scattered in between. 

However when Hordak laughed for the first time ever, she was caught completely off guard. 

When his eyes crinkled into little slits, and his laughter exposed his canines, her brain was shaken only leaving one thought. 

Beautiful.

Entrapta had found something more valuable than any discovery she's made in her career as a self made scientist.  She wanted to discover more about him, however he never talked about himself, which both enthralled and frustrated her to no end. But graduation was coming soon, and the last thing she wanted was for Hordak to not talk to her anymore like Adora and the others.

She had tried to put off the deadline, ignoring the growing stack of offer letters that could whisk her away to anywhere in the world.

Come with me. 

I can't. 

 Why? Had she misread them this whole time? Did he not want to be with her too? But she was wrong with Adora and her friends, and Catra. 

Someone told her once how people cannot be quantified, calculated, predicted. Feelings can be there one day and gone the next. She is no stranger to failure. But it doesn't mean she isn't afraid. 

-----

School resumes again for their final term, and Hordak is inwardly thrilled to see his friend in person again. Entrapta waves at him from the school gate, before diving headfirst into all the things that happened over the holidays she couldn’t show over text. 

They agree to be lab partners again without hesitation, and fall back into their comfortable friendship. 

Soon it’s prom season, and the halls are decorated in banners, posters and flyers. People are pairing off left and right, chattering away about how to ask their dates out. 

Hordak never attends these sort of events, he always blatantly refuses to go. However during one of their study sessions in the library, Entrapta tries to convince him to come with her. 

‘It’s meaningless to go to such an event. Mingling or dancing is not a productive venture.' 

'But it could be fun! I’ve been wanting to conduct a social experiment and it’s the perfect place for it.' She protests. 'Also Prom is imperative to the high school experience.' 

He waves her away, unconvinced. It's not like he could afford the tickets anyway, and Prime would never let him go. 

'I refuse to squander my time on something so pointless. There will be no further discussion on this.' 

She pouts, turning back to her notebook. The sulky charade lasts for a record 10 minutes before she caves and starts running her mouth again. 

He's still adamantly against it, but that sentiment gets stopped in its tracks when he catches someone approaching Entrapta.

'Hey, Entrapta was it?' The tall blonde says languidly. ‘Can I speak to you for a moment, over there?’ 

'Oh, sure!' She says, getting up from her chair. 'Can I get you something?' 

'Certainly!' 

Hordak listens to the conversation happening behind the bookshelf. He doesn't like the look of them, all greasy smiles and cocky demeanor.  

'A date to the prom, please.' They smirk, their tall stature allowing them to lean over her. 

Hordaks jaw drops, and the feeling of jealousy flares in the pit of his stomach. He fights the urge to throw that cocky bastard across the room. But the knowledge that he has no right to be angry when he had already turned down her offer kept him rooted to the spot. 

Thankfully Entrapta doesn’t seem to get it. 

'Oh I'm not organising that.’ She says, tapping her chin. ‘I think Frosta and her prom committee are. Or you could ask our school captain Adora and her prefects, they’ll know who to talk to get tickets.'  

They look dumbfounded, but hastily amend their wording. 

'No, I meant- will you be my date. To the prom.' 

'Me?' 

At this point there are marks on the wooden bookshelf from Hordak’s nails. The other person looked almost cocky in their confidence, smirking while waiting for a response. 

Of course she’d accept, they were just friends after all, and she didn’t owe him anything. However Entrapta cuts through his spiralling thoughts.

‘Thank you. But I won’t be going.’ 

Hordak looks up in surprise, shocked at her response. So do they, as Entrapta swiftly passes them and lights up when she spots him behind the shelf. ‘Hordak, there you are!’ She chirps brightly. ‘Come on, I wanted to show you progress photos of my new upgrades with Emily.’ 

He feels awful as she leads them back to their desks, it seems like he was letting down Entrapta a lot these days. First with the university, and now this. However Hordak is determined to make it up to her, racking his brain for ideas until he remembers the bandaids she had given him years ago.

Cupcakes. Despite not having much he managed to scrounge enough coins to buy ingredients. 

Half of them end up charred to a crisp but he manages to salvage a few through enough scraping. With the help of Imp, he manages to frost and decorate them purple and blue to cover up the scorch marks. 

Hordak thrusts the cupcakes in her face before class, before realising that he hadn't prepared anything to say.

'I, uh, wanted to..here.' He stammers, dropping them into her palm. 'I made them. For you.'

She looks at the cupcakes, stunned. To his complete and utter horror, Entrapta's eyes start to water.

Oh no. Did he mess up? His mind goes into overdrive in panic, and he looks around frantically for a way to calm her down.

'Were they unsatisfactory? I will try again. Please allow me to dispose of those-' He reaches out to take them back but she pulls it away.

'I love them.’ 

She wipes her eyes with her sleeve, and she's beaming a crooked smile. 

He hesitates, unsure what to make of her reaction. 

‘E-Entrapta..I, um…’ He begins, remembering the person in the library. He fishes around in his pocket and pulls out two tickets. ‘Do you want to.. Go to the prom. With me. So you can study people, like you said.’

Entrapta gasps, a long and drawn out one that gets higher in pitch.

‘THANK YOU HORDAK!!’ She squeals, and she practically launches herself into his chest, nearly toppling them over. ‘Of COURSE I will!’ 

He smiles at this, glad that he had been the one to put that grin on her face. Anything was worth making her happy. 

-------

It’s a bad night again. He wants nothing more than to stay in bed but he forces himself to get up, if nothing else to get away from Prime. His older brother had found out about the money he had taken to buy the prom tickets and make the cupcakes. This resulted in having the life beaten out of him while Imp watched, cowering behind the door. He gets his phone taken from him, a clear warning not to talk to Entrapta again. 

It’s summer, but Hordak opts for a black turtleneck sweater under his uniform and a baggy jacket. He however can’t disguise the bruises on his face, as usually Prime would avoid making markings that would arouse suspicion.

He can hear his classmates whisper amongst themselves, saying that he’s gotten into a fight and beat the rival gangs in the area. Hordak growls at them menacingly, and they scatter. He watches them go, and for the first time in a long time goes to skip class.

It’s nice out, a cool breeze on the rooftop soothes his skin. He gingerly takes his uniform off, wincing as he peels off the slightly blood stained sleeve.

He should be used to it by now. But it doesn’t get any better.

‘You didn’t reply to my texts.’

Hordak nearly jumped out of his skin, whipping around to see Entrapta. She has a delicate frown on her face, and looks at him up and down.

'You shouldn’t be here.’ He says, turning away. 

She doesn't look convinced, and starts to walk towards him. ‘Hordak-’ 

‘I said, GET OUT!’ He shouts, furiously wrapping his uniform back around his shoulders. ‘The prom’s off. Leave.’ 

Entrapta disregards his outburst, striding forward to confront him. 'I can’t keep ignoring this, Hordak.’ She catches his wrist easily, looking at his wounds. 

'You come to school with these new burns, these bruises, and you never TELL me anything.’ She says, pained. 'People say you got them in fights, but I know you. What really happened?’

He stares at her, but she looks determined. Ever the scientist, always looking for answers to things she didn’t understand. 

'You really want to know?’ He growls, tearing his arm from her grip. ‘I am an orphan. My brother Prime got full custody since he’s the only one old enough to earn money to support us. I can’t leave, no matter how much he beats me. My younger brother, Imp. He’s only a toddler- if I go, what happens to him? I couldn’t possibly support the both of us.’ 

She looks shocked, but doesn’t say anything. 

‘He’s ordered me not to talk to you. So that’s what I’m going to do. Don’t make it any harder for me.’ He tries to sound angry, but it comes off more like pleading. 

‘No.’ She says simply. 

He looks at her, incredulous. ‘Did you not hear what I just said-’

‘No, I heard you.’ She replies, bringing out bandages from her backpack like the first time they had met. 

‘I’ve got an idea. I’m breaking you out of there.’ 

‘You’re what?’ 

----

Lab Partner: Are you ready??

Hordak: This is such a bad idea.

He’s had no idea how he ended up in this situation. As per instruction via Entrapta’s burner phone, he had packed a getaway bag with their documents for him and Imp, and was waiting for several of her tiny bots surveillancing the area to give the all clear. 

Entrapta had temporarily disabled the security cams in the entire neighbourhood, and was currently waiting in the getaway car. 

Hordak:  I can’t believe I’m turning on my brother. 

Lab Partner: Its okay, we can work on that crisis later!! 

Lab Partner: I've also got your disguise in the car :))) 💃💃

Prime was still out at work, and it should be a few more hours until he came back. Hordak leads Imp by the hand down the driveway and fastens him into the booster seat of the getaway car. 

'He is so cuute!' Entrapta coos, poking his baby brother’s cheek. ‘I’m Entrapta. We’re gonna make sure you’re safe, okay?’ 

Imp nods, somewhat confused. ‘Entrapta.’ He repeats, and she grins. 

They peel out of the driveway, and although Entrapta is a terrifying driver they make it safely to her house outside the city. 

When they arrive, he is rendered speechless. Was this a castle? A mansion? The guards out front nod at Entrapta and the security gates open, letting them through. 

At least he knows Prime couldn’t possibly follow him here, thanks to Entrapta’s parents security team. 

Imp has taken to the place, admiring the many robots she had engineered. Her butler offers him some tiny beverages as he waits for Entrapta to finish whatever she was doing upstairs.  

After a while she comes down the stairs and he can practically feel himself stop breathing. She’s gorgeous, dressed in a purple velvet suit, tied together with a vest and a bow tie. Her coattails swish as she walks towards Hordak, who had been stunned into silence. 

‘I...ah..’ He stutters. ‘What is this for?’ 

Imp kicks him in the shin.

‘Uh. Y-you look... exemplary. A magnificent choice of attire.’ 

‘It’s prom today! Did you forget?’ She grins, whisking him from his seat and plonking him in front of the mirror. ‘We bought the tickets, we may as well go!’

‘But Imp-’

 ‘-Will be safe. There’s no way he’ll find him here. We’ll be in and out, and be back before he’s even left work.’ 

Entrapta takes out a makeup brush and some black lipstick, and starts applying it onto his face. For some reason he lets her work, he’s never really been able to say no to her. She styles his hair so some falls across his face. ‘Now for the good part!’ She declares, and brings out a long black dress combined with an inner red cape, with slits on the sides. They’re accompanied by tall black heels and a black clutch. 

‘I-I don’t know.’ He says. He’s never worn anything that bold or attention grabbing before, usually choosing clothes that would hide his scarring. 

‘Just try it on!’ 

------

They arrive at the prom arm in arm, and people audibly gasp as they walk down the stairs into the hall. The crowd clears from their path as they make their way down the venue, their stares turning into ones of admiration. 

The person from the library shoots them an affronted look, much to Hordak’s satisfaction. Perhaps this wasn’t so bad after all.  

Entrapta starts grabbing random food off the tables for Hordak to try. As he eats she starts recording Hordak’s different reactions to each new food into her little recorder. 

‘It’s absolutely fascinating how social groups function in peculiar ways! For example,’ She commentates, pointing at her old group of friends. ‘Catra asked Scorpia out to make Adora jealous.’ 

He watches the brunette antagonize her ex friend, and Adora seemed to be taking the bait. Scorpia watches on, looking disgruntled. 

‘Seems like it is working.’ 

‘No mind, Glimmer’s only Adora’s date to make Bow jealous. But according to my observations, that seems to be less successful.’ 

He nods, seemed like there was a lot going on in Etheria he had never cared to notice before. 

Soon they are interrupted by loud commanding voice on the microphone. It’s Frosta, and she’s announcing the first dance. She looks impossibly small up there behind the podium, which happens when you skip a few grades. 

‘Let’s go dance!’

‘I don’t know how to-’

Entrapta drags Hordak onto the dance floor before he can object, joining the other couples paired around them. She puts a hand around his waist, and clasps the other in his. 

'Also, Hordak! I got you something.' She says, almost shyly, handing him a box. 'Instead of a corsage...'

He peers inside and in the box is a beautiful purple crystal, embedded onto a necklace. It has some sort of foreign script engraved into it. 

‘Wait, is this…’ 

‘Yep! It’s the crystals we grew together at the lab last term!’ She beamed excitedly. ‘Didn’t they grow so beautifully?’ 

He turns the crystal in his fingers in awe. It’s been months since the incident with the beaker. ‘What does it say?’ 

‘O-oh. Um….’ 

She turns slightly red, embarrassed. Hordak is fascinated, he’s never seen her look like that before. He presses again, curious. 

Entrapta mumbles something incoherent, blushing up to her hairline. Her grip tightens on the fabric of his dress as she buries her head into his chest. 

‘Loved.’ 

His eyes widen in shock. She finally looks up, eyes burning with sudden conviction. The rest of the prom seems to fade away into the background. 

‘I love you, Hordak.’ 

Now it was his turn to go completely red- she also looks mortified, so now they were just two embarrassed teens in the middle of the dance floor.  

‘I-I love you too!’ He bursts out, awkward and fumbling but finally honest. 

‘Really?!’ She says, her hair floofing in excitement, like she can’t believe it. ‘You really do?’ 

‘Of course-’ and before he can explain the months of agony of being unable to fight his feelings she mashes her face against his. 

His knees almost buckle out of pure shock, but can feel himself melt into the kiss, her lips are unimaginably soft. He can feel her smile against his own, and she breaks it, giggling. She goes to say something but he's the one to interrupt her this time, kissing her over and over again as she squeals. 

He chuckles at her response, he doesn’t think he’s ever felt this happy. 

--- 

It's been a year since, and they find a cozy apartment in between their universities. Entrapta’s studying engineering at MIT while being cross registered at Harvard.

Meanwhile Hordak studies space science at Columbia University, while working part time. 

Hordak had collected all of his and Imp’s legal documents, voice recordings and picture evidence of the abuse and emailed them to Entrapta’s lawyers. Since he turned 18 he was able to win the court case against Prime and take Imp in to be under his legal guardianship. Thankfully he also managed to get a restraining order after a few incidents since Prime was outraged at losing his servants. 

‘I’m home.’ He says, opening the door to find Entrapta chasing Emily around the apartment, his younger brother perched on top. She picks up Imp from her bot holding him in her arms.

'Welcome back!' She greets him with a kiss. 'Ready to start our new project?' 

Hordak smiles, he's been doing that a lot lately. All the suffering he'd been through was all worthwhile if it brought him to this happy little family. He thumbs his little LUVD necklace which he wears every day. 

'Always.'

[serahsanguine]

Vacation Series Pt. 1 - Let The Games Commence. Ch, 3

This is the first book in a two-part series. This book is a six-part story which will be upload daily for the next week. After that, it will be Book two following the same pattern. it was originally made for the Summer Fanfic Exchange.

Tumblr - pt. 1, pt. 2  All chapters can be found Here on Ao3

This Chapter Rating; PG-13

*************************************

              Chapter 3: Day Two - The Village.

Scully woke up, in a tangle of sheets. She hadn’t worn much to bed as it was too warm even at 11 o'clock at night. The sun shone brightly through the folds in the blinds. If she were to take a guess, she would say it was around 9am. She had forgotten to set her alarm the night before, but she didn’t mind losing all sense of time. She sat up, the smell of fresh coffee and something else: breakfast maybe. She stepped out of bed, her legs slightly heavy as they hadn’t been used for a few hours. She walked through to her wardrobe grabbing her black silk kimono and wrapped it around her before descending down the stairs.

She stopped halfway to find Mulder listening to the radio and singing along to it. From what she could hear it was Jailhouse Rock by Elvis Presley. Then she looked around the room to find the table had been set with plates, cutlery, even a glass of freshly squeezed orange juice. It looked like he had cooked her a full English breakfast: bacon, eggs, mushrooms, sausages, tomatoes, beans, hash browns. 

She descended the rest of the stairs, making sure nothing was in Mulder’s hands before speaking just in case she made him jump. 

“I didn’t know you cooked Mulder.” 

He jumped a little and then turned around to face her, his eyes lighting up at the sight of her, his smile covering his full face. 

“It’s one of my many talents, it’s just no fun cooking for one.”

“So, in all those years I have known you, why haven’t you cooked for me?”

“You’ve never asked, Scully,” he was serious but not full of conviction.

“Touche.”

“Anyway, sit down. Breakfast is served, madam and if you would like a coffee, I just brewed a small pot.”

“Thank you, Mulder, but you didn’t have to do all of this.”

“Of course I do.” There was a short pause. “You deserve the world, Scully, ”  he whispered. 

His eyes told her he meant it. 

“Tuck in, Scully, before it gets cold.”

An hour later the food was eaten, and she enjoyed every last piece of it. He was an exceptional cook. He added spice and herbs and the food had never tasted so good. She nursed her coffee waiting for it to cool down 

“What is on the agenda for today, Mulder?”

“Well, I thought maybe we could wander through the village, and possibly try out their homemade ice cream.”

“That sounds like a wonderful idea,”  she soon finished her coffee and went upstairs to get changed. Soon after Mulder did the same. 

He shut his bedroom door, leaning against it and thinking about that morning events over and over again in his mind. But spending yesterday with her, he lost all resolve to keep his emotions in check, and guarded. She unintentionally was breaking those walls around his heart. But in doing so he felt like she was also letting him to hers. 

He walked to his suitcase, he still hadn’t unpacked, and his clothes were hanging out the sides. He found the brown shorts he was looking for and also the grey tank top. He quickly showered and changed before heading downstairs to wait for Scully.

30 minutes later and some more of his book read, he was sitting on the cushioned Wicca sofa when he heard Scully stepping down the stairs. He placed a bookmark where he had stopped, and placed the book next to him on the table. He shifted in his seat and looked around to see her. She was stunning, wearing a yellow long skirt and a white tank top.   Her hair was in a messy ponytail and she was wearing a straw kind of hat to keep the sun from burning her face, she had already slightly caught the sun yesterday as her normally pale skin was a tad on the pink side. 

“You ready to go?” he asked enthusiastically.

“Yes I am, but I can’t find my sandals, have you seen them?” He watched her look under the sofa, then around the front porch, then in the kitchen. 

“Scully have you tried on the back porch? ” he watched her walk out of the french doors staring at her ass. ‘One of these days she's gonna catch me staring, and when that day happens I'm done for” he smiled at the thought and watched her re-enter the room. 

“Thank you, how far is it to the village?”

“About a 20 minutes walk, 5 minutes on the beachfront, straight across the bridge and 5 minutes walk to the village.” 

She beamed a smile in his direction. 

“You might be able to see the wild horse as we walk, a little blonde bird told me they were in the area.”

He didn’t know it was possible but her smile got even wider. He knew how much she liked horses though she had never told him herself, he remembered the story her mother told him while she was missing of how her father took her to horse riding lessons whenever he was on leave. And it’s something the two of them shared until she was well into med school. 

//

The walk to the village was pleasant, she didn’t see the wild horses but she didn’t mind, spending time with Mulder was enough, he made light conversation, made her laugh telling her stories of the lone Gunmen and the pranks they pulled on each other. 

They stopped at local shops, they were so beautiful on the outside. There were brownstone buildings, wood buildings, flowers as far as the eye could see on each side of the road: blues, yellows, whites and so much lavender. She could smell them mixing with the sea air. 

When they were done browsing the local shops, they found a small restaurant on the main street looking out onto the marsh. She stood outside reading the sign  AJ’s on the creek. She walked inside and instantly smelled the seafood. She followed Mulder to the table and looked around. The tables were covered in crisp white linens and topped with paper napkins and bottles of hot sauce. She pulled a menu up to her face but causally lowered it a little so she could study her partner. He had definitely caught a tan, he was a lovely golden bronze now. She could see the sweat forming on his brow trickling down his nose. 

“What looks good Scully?”

“Hum…” 

“Scully?” 

Mulder looked at her with confusion. She looked back at him realising that she had been staring and daydreaming for the last 5 minutes about her partner. And she had been caught in the act. 

She started blushing, hoping he hadn't noticed, and if he did, hoping to put it down to the sun catching her Irish skin. 

“Oh the Seasonal soft-shell crab, served fried on platters, and a romaine salad is with a zesty citrus Caesar dressing, Parmesan crumbs, and crisped bread sounds delicious.” 

“The way you just made it sound, makes me want that exact dish.” He raised his eyebrows, in a mock teasing way. And she instantly knew there was a double meaning behind the first part of that sentence.

Their meal arrived and it was just as incredible as it sounded on the menu,  while she waited for him to finish she thought about a few things 

Her feelings for her partner were becoming so clear to her now, but she didn’t want to give in to them, she was scared of losing him, the friendship, their partnership.  He was slowly becoming everything to her. Like he was a part of her and no way in hell she would risk it. But damn she just wanted to kiss him, pull that bottom lip of his in her lips and bite it hard. She soon suppressed such a feeling and carried on.  

“I have a small surprise for you before we go to the ice cream shop.”

“Mulder, you know I don't like surprises.”

“Well, Miss, I know, but you will love this one, I promise. ” 

“Sure, fine, whatever.”

Mulder paid for the meal and started leaving her following close. Just before she stepped out, someone stopped her by gently tapping her on the shoulder.

“You have a lovely husband there, he is definitely a keeper.”

She didn’t know how to respond, she didn’t want to correct the poor woman. But she didn’t have an answer for her. So she simply nodded and left the restaurant. 

30 minutes later and both of them were standing outside a quite large building looking at the sea.

“What are we doing here, Mulder?”

Before he could answer and an elderly gentleman came up the gate. He was dressed in blue levis and a black and red checkered shirt. 

“Mr and Mrs Mulder?”

 Again they were mistaken for a married couple, twice in one hour. She sighed, not saying anything again and Mulder didn’t correct the man either. Instead, he nodded at the old man.

“Ok, then, this way. They’re going to need to be brushed, before you go on them. But they are both beautiful.”

Mulder nodded again and looked at her utterly confused face. He just gave her a wide grin while he guided her to a stable. There were two beautiful pedigree horses: one completely black and another, white and brown. 

“Oh, my God, they are beautiful Mulder; but I still don’t get it?”

“Yes they are Mrs Mulder,” the old man interrupted her. “And they are just ready to go out. Just before I leave you two alone, Mr Mulder said you didn’t need any training to ride the horses and both of you have previous experience.”

“Yes, thank you.” 

With that, the man left them alone.

“How did you know I used to ride? And, more importantly, how did I not know that you do too?”

“First, your mother told me. And second, I learnt with Samantha on the vineyard. She loved horses and she didn’t want to go alone because at first, they scared her.” 

Scully saw the pain in his eyes, but there were also small hints at happiness from the memories.  

“Why did you never tell me?” she asked moving towards the black horse.

“I suppose it just never came up.”

// 

Mulder saw the delight in Scully’s eyes as she trouted along the beachfront: she was truly enjoying herself. Her hair was like fire against the blue of the sea and the black of the horse. 

“Mulder, I’m so glad we did this, it’s been a very long time since I rode a horse.”

“My pleasure Scully. We really should be heading back if you want to try that ice cream.” 

“Ok, race you!” she suddenly yelled and took the horse into a full gallop, leaving a cloud of sand dust in her mist. 

“Cheat!” he shouted, but she was gone

Mulder clicked the rains and went into a full gallop after her. When he finally caught up to her, she was stroking her horse waiting for him. 

“What took you so long?” she was trying to stifle her laugh. 

“You do know that cheaters never prosper,” he looked at her and she was still holding her laugh back.

“And Foxes don't win.”

“Wow, Scully, below the belt.” 

He was teasing her and she knew it. He picked her up off her horse and brought her close to his body before putting her on the ground, rubbing her a little too much against his body.

She pulled him close, lent up on her tiptoes, and whispered in his ear. 

“I know that’s where you want me, and I want it too.” 

She turned around on her heels, grabbing the horse’s reins, and walked towards the stable. She erupted with laughter, leaving him dum-stuck, unable to speak or even breathe. He finally managed to remember how to breathe and grabbed the reins on his horse finally walking to put him back in the stable while contemplating what she had said to him. 

Did she really mean it? I’d be over the moon. But what if she was teasing me? Just playing my game? Those three things kept running over and over again in his mind. 

He hitched the horse on the wood, closing the stable door. Scully was waiting for him just like always. The elderly gentleman thanked them and told them to enjoy the rest of their holiday. Mulder placed his hand at the small of her back and lead her towards the ice cream shop.

They arrived soon and stepped inside. It was a small but beautiful place, with light wood everywhere, something straight out of a magazine beautiful. The sun was setting, bouncing orange beams around the shop's white walls leaving a shimmering glow.  

“What ice cream are you picking, Scully?”

“I’m having a double cone: one side filled with chocolate, and the other, rum and raisins.”   

“Sound’s yummy.”

She ordered her ice cream and turned around to him. 

“What flavour are you having?”

“I was thinking of chocolate orange.”

“Now that sounds nice, Mulder, I can’t wait to try it.”

She had confused him again, but he caught the look in her eyes. It was a wicked look full of mischief.

Their ice creams were soon devoured and Scully had got closer to him. He hadn’t realised he had some ice cream on his chin and kept wondering why Scully was staring at him. She leant in close and whispered.

“I meant what I said earlier.” 

She kissed his cheek and then his nose, they were so feather-like, her lips barely touched his skin. His heart was hammering in his chest and again he was left gasping for air. He looked into her eyes, knowing if he looked he would know if she was teasing. He looked into the warm blue and was lost there. But he saw everything he had ever wanted, the whole truth. She loved him and meant it. Her lips caught him by surprise as she pressed them against his. Her tongue was seeking entrance and he opened up gladly. Their lips were gliding against each other, their tongues exploring every crevice in each other’s mouth. His eyes had shut, enjoying the feeling of their mouths touching. She let go and he sighed missing her already. 

“Chocolate orange does taste nice,” she said giggling like a schoolgirl.

“And chocolate and rum and raisin taste even better.”

They left the restaurant hand in hand, both content with the moment neither wanting to push. Just enjoying the simple pleasure of each other. 

**************************

Tagging; @skullsmuldon @today-in-fic @baronessblixen @peacenik0

[noitomwols]

how to survive as a depressed person during quarantine (me edition)

-Take those weeks to take of yourself, both physically and mentally. Shower every morning/evening if you are able to. If not, try at least twice a week. It’s a good time to give your body a well-deserved treatment. Use masks, patches, body cream, oils. You may even try the sebum cure everyone is talking about non-stop! 

-Hydration is key. Please, just because you’re staying inside doesn’t mean your body is not lacking water. Drink as much water as you can. It will clear your skin, and help you deal with the shit happening worldwide.

-Respect the deadlines for your work and college inscription. 🌱

-It’s time to catch up with your favorite series, including Supernatural, Big Little Lies 🌱, Free!

-You may even start new ones, no one can blame you (Sharp Objects)

-Finish the current book you are reading (His Dark Materials) 🌱 and start all those dusty forgotten works that lie in the cupboards. Give it a shot of fifty pages, you surprise yourself!

-It is important not to forget to move your body in any way you can. Rollerskate in the parking lot as it isn’t outside and actually convenient enough to slide. Work out at least three times a week to release some serotonin in yourself. Sweat it all out: the frustration of being on lockdown, the anger of cancelled holidays, the sadness of being away from your lover.

-Those weeks may as well embody a perfect time for the spring clean of the year! Cleaning the windows inside and out 🌱, throwing away useless old objects (or selling them, or giving them to charities), cleaning the all closet from the clothes you don’t wear anymore (so when everything’s over, you may shop for new ones!) or gardening if you have the chance to do so. 

-Teach your younger siblings if their schools are closed. As for me, I will teach my little sister French, history and English in order for her not to get behind her classmates or fail her exams.

-For editors: now is the time to finally finish all those leftovers projects you swore to once post. Me included. 

-Learn a new language with the help of Duolingo or Internet (Dutch for myself). Write all the new words you’ve learnt in a notebook, make it pretty with stickers and colors. The more you put your brain at work, the more you will likely to stress less. (Although I suffer from bad anxiety and depression, I know deep down inside me that this is truth. Not always easy to do tho.)

-Write. For yourself, for others. Keep a diary to keep sane. Write for contests, or start that project that’s been luring inside your thoughts for too long. 

-Look for a place to live in The Netherlands. Make sure to check every day.

-Now might be a perfect time to learn how to cook. Once everything calms down, we may go back again to the supermarkets and start perhaps baking new delicious recipes. 

-Napping. No need to feel guilty. It is genuinely the only thing you can do during those times. 

-Redecorating your room. Changing furnitures from their original place.

-Buy Animal Crossing New Horizons. 🌱

-Do your nails/toenails 🦋

-Watch Prison Break again. 🌱

-Reorganize your music playlists!

-Order Bubbles At Home. ���

-Order make up palette. 🌱

-Clean the kitchen, organize cupboards, clean the fridge out.

-Watch new movies/documentaries on Netflix with people you’re quarantined with/or by yourself.

-Create mapart on Minecraft!

-Do boardgames. 🧸

-Clean the shoes. 🌱

-Go to the basement to put the suitcase, the clothes and fetch roller protections. 🌱

-Write the authorization for Phil.

-Clean the sheets 🌱

-Put the pillows in the vacuum bag. 🌱

-Drink tea 🍵

-Vaccum your room! 🌱

-Try yoga and kung-fu. 🌱

(I’ll add more if you guys have any ideas!)

[flydotnet]

Hidden Guardians of Humanity

VRAINS Rarepair Weeks 2018 - Day 7: Other YGO series crossover/Other Fandom AU

Summary: Six teenagers regularly save the world from the misanthropic virus-like AI XANA on a virtual world. This is their story through one of these missions against humanity's greatest danger yet. 

Fandoms: Yu-Gi-Oh! VRAINS/Code Lyoko Ships: Hireshipping (Ema/Akira), Entrustshipping (Takeru/Kiku), Zinniashipping (Miyu/Aoi)

Wordcount: 3.8K words

Notes: "On ira, on saura, sauver notre existence, Se donner une chance de tout dépasser. On ira, on saura, sauver notre existence, Afin de faire, Un monde sans danger !"

I was stumbled at first with what to do for today. All the crossover ideas I had weren't very good... until I thought about Code Lyoko and how it was a perfect fit with VRAINS. A virtual world? Check. Keeping stuff secret from other people? Check. A recurring theme of AIs? Check. I rediscovered CL this year by watching the episodes now all up on YT (I think that's only for the original French dub, though). It's been a big part of my childhood and I surprised myself to like it even more as an adult. It was pretty messed up if you think about it: a bunch of teenagers ranging from 13 to 15 saving the world in secret on a daily basis while risking their lives to do so? That's dark for a kid's show dude. The series wasn't hiding it anyway: I can't count the exact number of ways XANA (a big bad virus-like AI) tried to kill the protagonists in. Anyway.

I changed a few settings. Kadic is supposed to be a middle school (collège), but since it's supposed to be a high school too (funny enough, the school it's based on, the Lycée Lakanal, is where I set a part of my original work), well why not. It fitted much better with the VRAINS cast too. I also took some liberties with the original 2003 run of the show to provide more modern technology like smartphones.

This story is, in short, a love letter to Code Lyoko and to my VRAINS OTPs. I may have forgotten to put the romance into that fic though.

PS. The quote in the beginning is the chorus to the Code Lyoko opening, "Un Monde Sans Danger" (A World Without Dangers). That song has been burnt into my soul ever since I was a kid. 

Event hosted by @vrainsrarepairweeks

AO3 version available here.

It was yet another day of class at Kadic High School, Boulogne-Billancourt, Hauts-de-Seine. Nothing out of the ordinary, for once: boring Physics lessons, typical teenage drama, rumours going through the school about teachers and students alike. In that, it made no difference to any other day before it and any other day that would come after it. However, the routine was only a façade in this school near Paris.

Very few knew about the shortcut in the heater room of the dormitory or the one in the school’s park leading the abandoned factory nearby, resting in an island in the Seine. Most people would have just assumed that place was, well, abandoned and empty. The fact was that: that was wrong. That fact was proven untrue by the presence of a bunch of teenagers going there to save the world on a daily basis.

 However, today was a tranquil day in class of rumours and drama. There was always Naoki Shima spreading some kind of rumour on his idol, an e-sport player named Playmaker, which was mostly talked about by fangirls of him around the campus. Meanwhile, a little group of six students was gathering in their usual spot: near the coffee machine, on a bench, waiting for bell never to ring the beginning of classes.

They had formed this little group of friends of theirs in unlikely circumstances. It all started when Ema, from the twelfth-grade class majoring in computer sciences, discovered a way to access the abandoned factory in the river easily after a boring day of school. She apparently had to drag with her Akira, her classmate and a friend since middle school, there. Afterwards, they accidentally dragged with them Aoi, Akira’s younger sister in tenth grade, when she followed them to the factory on one day and stuck with them ever since. With Aoi came her own classmates Takeru and Kiku, who followed suit after they themselves found out about the factory by being friendly to the otherwise isolated Aoi.

 “Hey, guys,” Takeru opened the conversation as he looked at the other students in the courtyard. “It’s been a while since XANA last attacked… You think he’s going to come back soon?”

“I hope not,” Kiku replied with the most honesty in the world. “He almost killed sent everyone to space last time… We were lucky you were competing in the martial arts tournament that time, Takeru!”

“XANA will always come back until the Supercomputer isn’t turned off, I’m afraid,” Akira stated as he came back with two cups of coffee in his hands.

“Then that means you need to find the program to materialize Miyu soon!” Ema enthusiastically added as she thanked Akira for the cup of coffee. “It’s on me next time.”

“I’m doing what I can, but it’s going to take longer than expected. Last night was a fluke again,” he sighed as he rubbed his eyes with the hand not busy holding a cup. The yawn would be for another day.

“It’s fine, big brother,” Aoi simply said as she looked at him with a tiny smile. “You’re already doing your best, and Miyu has told us that before.”

“Your sister is right, Akira, don’t overexert yourself for that! I don’t want to recover your unconscious body on the floor of your room again and almost get scolded by Jim again for sneaking into the boys’ dorm for that!”

Takeru and Kiku simply giggled at the anecdote despite how many times Ema had already told them about it.

During Maths class, as usual, Ema was on her phone during yet another boring lecture from the teacher. There had to be someone watching over Lyoko when nobody could be at the factory in case an activated tower, XANA’s gateway to their world and all the potential damage that would always bring with it, showed up in the virtual world. That was a nice way to spend time: instead of sitting through a painfully tedious session of mathematics, she could just chat with Miyu and whoever else was online. It was funnier to be there and occasionally see Akira stare at her to be serious during a class for once.

He only didn’t ask her to stop on the spot because she otherwise could refuse to lend him their philosophy lessons whenever he’d simply stop understanding most of it. The confusing words and concepts didn’t work very well with his arithmetic brain. It was a fine compromise, though.

 Right when she was about to point out something funny Aoi had said in the chatroom with Miyu, she heard a strange buzzing sound. The neon over their hands started flickering ever so slightly, before the infection spread to the entire ceiling of the classroom.

“You know what this means?” she asked Akira in a whisper.

“A XANA attack. Did Miyu tell you about an activated tower?”

Her eyes immediately darted to the screen, only for a message to confirm their fears. Akira didn’t add anything more.

“Then what excuse do we throw?” she asked again, eyeing the little app she had on her phone she had freshly finished programming in her spare time (or whatever was left of it these days).

 Before she could ask anything, the bell rang. Their eyes bolted in different directions, checking for two different parameters: hers to the teacher, his to the hour on his phone. The former didn’t have a watch, the second didn’t match the time class ended at. As everyone was packing their things together to change classrooms, another ring resonated through the corridors: the fire alarm.

“Okay, it’s definitely a XANA attack”, Akira stated the obvious. “Warn everyone to meet together at the factory before we can get spotted by teachers or monitors.”

“Roger that.”

  It always took some time to reach the factory and gather everyone. That was why they had this habit of only meeting in the main computer room instead of in front of the factory, giving them more time to fight against whatever XANA had to throw at them on Lyoko. Akira and Ema had arrived first and launched themselves in the elevator to the main rooms before getting joined by Aoi shortly thereafter.

“Takeru and Kiku will be a bit late,” she told them, “I think they had class on a higher floor and had more troubles exiting the school.”

 Moments after, the three had taken their respective spots: Akira at the main computer, Ema and Aoi in the cylindrical scans on the floor under the computer room. He had never been a man of actions and was the only one with a real knowledge of how to use the technical beast that was the Supercomputer. Meanwhile, Ema had always loved the thrill of action: fighting creatures on Lyoko was good way for her to exhort her thirst for a way to break away from the real world, even if it was just for a few minutes. Aoi was calmer, but still followed through when she learnt this could help both her brother and the friend she had found in Miyu.

“Are you ready to get virtualized?” he asked them as they set foot in the room, footsteps resonating on the iron floor.

“Of course!” Ema replied with thrill in her voice.

“I am,” Aoi responded more seriously.

“Then let’s get on with it.”

 Four scanners presented themselves to the two girls. Each climbing in one, the virtualization process didn’t take more than thirty seconds anymore. They were used to it: getting transferred inside a virtual world wasn’t painful, at best it was dizzying the first few times. Soon enough, Aoi and Ema found themselves in a forest-like environment, all changed up to battle attire. It wasn’t just for show: if Aoi had wings, it was because she could use them to fly. Ema, who hadn’t design herself in her subconscious mind to get those, was kind of envious.

“Miyu should be nearby waiting for backup,” Akira’s voice arrived from the sky of Lyoko’s Forest territory. “Be careful to monsters, XANA has been waiting for us.”

“As usual,” Ema sighed, amused. “Let’s do this, Aoi.”

 As they ran to their destination, a tower with a red halo, a girl with long pink hair in pigtails and blue eyes joined them. Aoi’s eyes started to shimmer as soon as they noticed her coming towards them, changing her sprinting direction to directly meet up with their friend. They had a habit of hugging each other as soon as they saw each other too. They had gotten more and more physical when meeting up in Lyoko, to the point of holding each other’s hands nowadays when seeing the others. Ema was certain that, would Miyu know about love like any other girl (despite being a sentient AI that was, frankly, more human than some actual humans she knew), they would already be dating. She remembered overhearing Aoi train herself to declare her love to her friend in her dorm room, after all.

“I’m glad to know you’re alright, Miyu!” Aoi told her as they went back to reaching the tower.

“Thank you for coming so quickly, Aoi, Ema! XANA has sent three Bloks who are guarding the tower, we need to be careful!”

 Turning her eyes away from the two friends, Ema noticed one of the Bloks shooting at them.

“Out of the way!!”

Pushing Aoi and Miyu out of the line of fire from the creature sent to them, she took a direct hit to the shoulder from a laser beam, falling to the ground. Trying to shoot back with her own laser arrows at the creature, she was at least relieved to see Aoi and Miyu had made it behind a tree to find a way to shelter themselves from the incoming attacks.

“Ema!!” Aoi’s scream was accompanied by the mirror of Miyu’s mirror reflecting the hit the older girl was about to take, which would have certainly devirtualized her. The Blok took the hit right in its eye, exploding shortly after.

 The commotion from this encounter passed, the three girls hid behind the very same tree. There were mock Bloks in the area, almost twice as much as they had first expected. As she watched from behind their little hiding spot, Ema could only notice this would be harder than expected with Miyu virtually unable to fight for herself and herself having taken a hit already.

“That was such a close call!” Miyu sighed in relief. “We really need to be more careful…”

She was holding onto Aoi’s hand as she said so, her sceptre in her other hand. Nobody knew where that weapon came from, really, but they had brushed it off as a mere way to self-defend against XANA’s monsters who, as it turned out, mostly used laser beams with long ranges to attempt ending her own life.

“Let’s be more careful until Takeru and Kiku can get here,” Aoi decided, with the two others nodding in agreement.

  “Sorry we’re late…!” Takeru said as he entered the main computer room, breathless.

Akira immediately turned around, his one-ear headphone-microphone still on, a smirk drawing on his face. Backup was finally here.

“Jim tried to prevent us from reaching the factory when we tried to go through the heater room shortcut,” Kiku further explained.

“I see. Ema and Aoi required backup, there’s apparently too many monsters for them to deal with.

She glanced at her childhood friend whose back was against the wall, still not recovering his breath.

“Are you okay, Takeru?” she asked with concern all over her tone, hands on her chest.

“I… I’ll be fine… Let’s get to the scanners quickly, I’m sure Aoi, Ema and Miyu need our help…”

 Even if nobody added anything, Akira turning back to the monitor to make sure this wasn’t a burning failure yet, Kiku remained worried. As the elevator went down another floor, she couldn’t get her eyes off Takeru and how flimsy his breathing was. He had never had a pristine health record, and that despite how good he was at martial arts, which made it so she was always concerned in some degree for his condition.

When the doors opened to reveal the scanner room, she handed her friend her help. He gave her a slight smile, a quiet way to tell her not to worry, as they climbed into their own cylinders to get virtualized. There was no time to lose and no time to get concerned for Takeru when there was a tower to deactivate and XANA going on a rampage to make everyone deaf by the end of the day through abusing ringing systems, ringtones and speakers.

 The two soon enough ended in the Forest territory of Lyoko, with instructions given by Akira to join back the others. Running on their legs, the virtualization keeping them away from whatever feeling of physical fatigue they’d have felt from that, they soon noticed the group of monsters blocking the way and their friends behind a big tree.

“Oh, looks like XANA did already send a party,” Takeru noticed. “Let’s be sneaky and see if we can end them without Miyu being targeted by them.”

“Agreed.”

 “Takeru! Kiku!”

Miyu seemed ecstatic to see them arrive, screaming their names in joy. Only then did she put her hand on her month, remembering XANA’s monsters could hear them. It was easy to make a diversion, but that was it.

“Akira!” Ema yelled to the sky to get their control tower’s attention. “How much enemies are they?”

No response.

“Oh God, that’s bad,” she then spoke to herself. “He must have been knocked away from the main panel.”

“Something happened to my brother?” Aoi panicked immediately thereafter, before clutching Miyu’s hand to keep her calm.

“It may have,” Kiku added as she joined them. “One of us needs to go check.”

 They stared at each other, before Ema decided to take the head of things.

“Okay, I’ve got a plan. Aoi, you stay with Miyu to make sure she arrives to the tower in one piece! I’m going with Takeru to face them directly, while Kiku shoots them from the back. I’ve already taken a hit and Takeru has a powerful long-range weapon. Everyone’s good with that?”

“Roger!” Everyone replied in unison as they split in groups.

 Ema had in her mind the secret hope of being devirtualized immediately. Takeru had less health point than she did, but she had already taken a hit and was the only one with any knowledge of the Supercomputer outside of Akira who seemed to spend a huge chunk of his nights on it. It was a perfect match for who had to go back to the real world to check on their friends.

She could see Kiku in her white kimono-like robe, braid flowing through the air as she ran and ran, in the corner of her eye running behind Bloks to stab them with her spear in their top eye, jumping on them, braid going up and down, causing their own self-destruction. She was clearly always going for those targeting Takeru, in a nice touch. The boy was himself with her throwing fire at the enemies, either to blind them or critically damage them.

In the corner of her other, Miyu and Aoi ran with their fingers intertwined, the latter with her own weapon out, ready to jump into action if needed. It was a safer solution for them than for Aoi to hold Miyu as she flew over the battlefield just in case she’d get shot in the wings: would that happen, they’d both take considerable fall damage and risk getting devirtualized. The possibility meaning the death of Miyu if it took place, they preferred to stay safe and go a bit slower. Good stuff there.

 Because she wasn’t paying all her attention to monsters, Ema quickly found herself to be devirtualized by a second hit in the chest, making her virtual body shatter in pixels before she could resurface in the factory.

  Exiting the scanner after getting forcefully devirtualized wasn’t the best feeling in the world, but Ema had no time for dizziness. She ran as fast as possible to the elevator and rushed her hands over the panel to go to the upper floor. They weren’t strangers to XANA using towers to gain access to the real world. In fact, they were even used to Akira getting attacked as to hinder the progress of those on Lyoko. The question was: what had it done to her friend while she was away in the virtual world?

As soon as the door opened, she realized two things: XANA had used a severed electric cable to do its deed, and Akira was unconscious the floor because of it. Her first thought was to rush to his side, to check if he was doing fine. A hand on his wrist, another on his forehead, and her eyes half-focused on the severed cable which now looked as inert as it should be, she let out a sigh of relief when she heard his pulse.

“You scared us again, you idiot,” she muttered under her breath. “Now, if you’ll excuse me, I need to keep an eye on an important mission.”

 She gently half-sat Akira against a nearby wall and jumped into the chair facing the screens monitoring everything. Embracing the control tower nature of it all, she picked the headphone and put it on her ear.

“Anyone, you’re receiving me? It’s Ema!”

Everyone or so replied positively.

“Lemme see…” Her eyes deciphered as much information as they possibly could on the monitors. “Takeru, you’re down to 20HP, be careful! One hit and you’re sent back home! Kiku, there should be a Blok behind you! Aoi, Miyu, you’re near the tower, you may be able to fly there…”

 She interrupted herself when she saw the cable rise back to life, just as she heard everyone call out for Takeru’s voice. Getting down to her feet, taking a fighting stance, she hoped to be able to fight it back enough to have the time for the boy to reach her room. She knew how to activate the Return to the Past to fix all the damage the buildings around the school must have taken from the excessive sound, if the fact she was able to hear some low-quality rap music from the underground rooms of a factory was any indication, but Takeru didn’t.

Avoiding getting tripped by jumping over the cable’s feet, she was relieved to hear Takeru running towards her. He looked a bit out of breath from running so quickly in so little time, but he took his own fighting stance.

“Ema, get to the computer! I’m sure the others need you there!”

 Nodding to him as to confirm his decisions, she jumped back into the chair to see the information: Kiku was close to devritualization with a mere ten HP remaining while Miyu was just about to enter the tower. Trying her hardest to ignore how one-sided Takeru’s fight against the cable was becoming in favour of XANA, she focused on the screens. The boy’s pained scream when his back slammed against the wall didn’t help. Before she could entirely redirect her focus, Kiku had been defeated by a last laser beam.

“Aoi, be careful, Kiku just got eliminated!”

“We know,” the brown-haired girl replied from the other side of the screen. “Miyu is entering the tower now, I’ll try to keep back the last enemies until she can deactivate it!”

“Good, but please make it quick, Akira got stunned and Takeru may be injured from fighting a cable. I’m afraid I’ll be the next, not going to lie there.”

 Kiku soon joined the scene, judging from the elevator’s doors opening again and her little steps rushing to Takeru’s side.

“Ki… Kiku…” His weakened voice tried to warn his friend. “Don’t… Come here…”

Without a word, avoiding getting knocked back by the giant cable, she kneeled next to him, her gaze soon fixated on her friend rather than the incoming danger.

“Are you alright, Takeru?!”

“I… I think I’ve broken something against it… But it’s gonna be fine,  don’t worry… I’m sure Miyu is about to deactivate the tower…” He gave a timid but warm smile to her.

She gently held him against her, a half-felt one on her lips…

“It’s going to be fine. It’s always going to be fine.”

Judging from Takeru’s weak grip, she knew his hand had been broken in his fight against the machine.

  Entering the tower, Miyu made her way as fast as possible to the little panel presented in every tower. As soon as she put her hand on it, the system automatically recognized her, greeting her with the ever same and cold protocol.

MIYU

CODE: LYOKO

The entire tower progressively turned empty as it deactivated. From this little virtual pseudo-cocoon, she could only hope as she looked down everything was fine outside.

 Soon enough, the familiar energy wave of the Return to the Past resonated through the virtual world, making her smile as she thought that, once again, everything would be fine and that they had all saved the day.

  They were back in the same Maths class, which was still boring, still not interesting. A side effect of using the Return to the Past, obviously. At least, she could safely say that

“Hey, do you remember what happened to you before you got unconscious earlier?” she asked trying to hide her concern.

“I got electricized by a cable, that’s all I can remember. It doesn’t matter much anyway, the Return to the Past cancels every injury we could have sustained.”

“Well, that’s fortunate for Takeru, he broke his hand when fighting the cable.”

 Akira suddenly looked very pensive, before having a sort of epiphany flashing on his face.

“That makes me think… I should teach you how to use the Supercomputer, Ema, in case this ever happens again,” he whispered to her.

“I’m not against it. I already know how to use it, as you can see, but you could show me your… special tricks.”

The slight innuendo was enough to make him redden in a moment and look to the side.

“D-don’t phrase it like that…”

She grinned at his embarrassment. He was way too easy to tease, but it was always so much fun.

“Oh, by the way,” she added, “your sister is probably going to get a girlfriend soon, and she won’t even be material unless you come up with your program.”

“E… Excuse me?!”

“Miyu. She’s in love with Miyu and vice-versa. It’s just that you’re never here to see them flirt with each other knowingly or not.”

“Oh. That makes sense, when you precise it that way.”

“I know.”

 Now, if she had the same modesty as Aoi, maybe she would have the guts to tell him about her ever-growing crush on him…

[wallsinner]

Title: Ruin the Friendship Pairing: Marco Bodt x Female Reader, Thomas Wagner x Female Reader, past F!Reader/Bertholdt, past Marco x Mina. Warnings: Smut, copious usage of the nickname Maru Words: 10,956 Summary: Marco's eyes flickered to the lamp next to his bed, before he climbed off it and crossed the room to the half-open window to look out. And there he saw someone – presumably you – standing outside the Bodt's house on the front lawn. When he moved his curtain to peek out, you looked up. He sighed. Okay, fuck. He guessed he was going to have to go down and talk to you or something. He threw his phone onto his bed and headed downstairs.  Notes: This is a rewritten old fic, had to do something for his birthday, duh.

Marco's brown eyes watched the girl next to him – also known as you – with an intensity that went unnoticed. All that you was really doing was texting, fingers flying fast across the screen of the phone in her hand, but as you reply to each text, you giggle in what Marco thinks is the most adorable way possible and smile as you type back. He doesn't know who you're texting, but there's a little nagging feeling in the back of his mind that hopes that it's just one of your female friends, but all he knows is that you look ridiculously pretty as you do it and all that he wants to do is reach over and grab you and kiss you in front of the whole cafeteria. Of course he'd never do it though, it would be too embarrassing, especially if you slapped him because of that whole issue of if he just grabbed you and kissed you then you wouldn't have given your consent.

And also he's worried that if you did that then you'd never talk to him again, which he would really, really, really hate.

You'd been one of Marco's closest friends for years. You'd met when you'd been five and he'd been a very mature six months older than you at six. It had been when your family had moved into the street where the Bodt's had lived since before Marco had been born and they were of course the favourite family on the block. Always welcoming in a neighbourhood full of people who didn't really talk to their neighbours and so your parents had become fast friends with Marco's and the pair of you had been thrown together. And Marco had liked you from the first moment he'd met you – not like liked you of course, no those feelings had come on when the pair of you had been much older – but he'd found your five year old self funny and charming. The more he got to know you he learnt stuff like the way you weren't scared to stand up to the other kids on the street who could be mean, the same people who would tease Marco because he was such good friends with a girl.

And besides, even if he hadn't wanted to be your friend, he wouldn't have really ended up having much say in it because of the way your parental units had become such good friends, your families had always tended to spend a lot of time together, like when both parents were off work for the weekend and the two of you would end up playing in each other's bedrooms or yards, whilst your parents enjoyed food and wine.

Though, ultimately, the dynamics of your friendship had changed over the years when you'd started to move up through school and through grades. It was then that you didn't see a lot of each other until weekends and occasionally after school during the early years of middle school, but once you'd reached high school your friend groups had started to meld together a little more. Mainly due to the inter-dating that had begun once you'd all realized that not everyone had cooties. Your friend Sasha had pretty much harassed Marco's good friend Jean into dating her for about a week before they'd had an over-dramatic break-up and she'd replaced him with Armin for three days and then later, Connie. Reiner had picked up something of a thing for Christa (though Reiner had picked up a thing for just about everyone they'd gone to school with over the years) and they'd made out once, which had caused Christa's realization into who she really liked and Reiner was still proud to be the first person that she'd come out to and had been her biggest support since. The list of couplings was ridiculous and interwoven, Marco himself had dated your then best friend Mina for quite some time until she'd moved out of the school district and lost touch. And you had dated your mutual friend, Bertholdt, for a few weeks, though nobody had ever really taken that serious because all that relationship was was you and him only communicating over AIM and ignoring each other when you saw each other in the flesh.

Though... Marco would quite like to pretend that that had never happened at all, because it would be easier to forget the memory of the night that you and Bertholdt had once reconciled during an alcohol fuelled party at Eren and Mikasa's that had led to him walking in on something that was still burned into his retinas that no amount of brain bleach would ever erase.

You'd remained friends all throughout the rest of your high school years and past graduation, you'd comforted each other when your friends had started to leave town and to go to separate colleges, but the bare bones of the group had ended up in the same community college, still hung out on a daily basis and were still a pretty tight knit group. And of course, you and Marco were still close, still lived on the same street and were still in and out of each other's houses. And as far as you knew, nothing about the two of you had changed.

You had no idea that Marco's feelings towards you had changed quiet significantly in the past couple of years. He wasn't quite sure when it had happened, it was like they'd changed overnight, but he knew that something must have happened to trigger it One day he'd been having a normal conversation with you and the next thing he knew he was thinking about how pretty you were and how much he wanted to tuck your hair behind your ear and make out with your face and never let you go. You weren't that cute little five year old girl any more, you were almost twenty and still cute but in a different way, a different way meaning that you'd grown into an intelligent, funny, selfless person And had he mentioned pretty? You were always putting other people and their happiness before your own, not really caring about your own feelings. Marco had watched you many times during the last year of high school giving your lunch to a homeless man who lived on the route to school, or sat with some kid from the elementary school next door who was upset because their parents had turned up to pick them up. All in all, you were good people.

And Marco wanted you more than he'd ever wanted anything before and it sucked that he couldn't just tell you that. Part of him wished that one day you'd just figure it out yourself that his eyes were always on you, that sometimes he lost his words around you these days, that he got protective and jealous when you were out with your friends and boys that you didn't know talked to you. Sometimes he thought that the easiest thing in this situation would be for you to just let him down gently and then the pair of you could move on with your own lives.

But of course, you hadn't noticed.

And of course – of fucking course – every other one of your friends could see right through it. But at least they had the sense not to say anything about it in front of you, and drop it when he denied it. Well, most of them at least, Reiner and Jean would definitely drop hints around you, hints that you thankfully never picked up on. In their own twisted minds, they thought they were helping, in Marco's mind he wanted to strangle them, or himself, just to get away from all of it.

“Hey, is there something on my face?” Your voice cut through Marco's thoughts and he turned to see that you'd looked up from your phone and your nose was wrinkled up in the cutest of ways as you looked at him curiously. You'd clearly looked up when he was spaced out and thinking and caught his eyes on you. He could hear Reiner on the other side of the table trying to hold in his sniggers and Jean wasn't even trying to conceal it. Your hand tentatively touched your face nervously. “...I knew you shouldn't have put ketchup on the fries,” she muttered staring down at Marco's plate, where you'd been eating from after giving your lunch away to someone who'd forgotten theirs again.

“Huh? Oh, sorry... I was just... thinking...” Marco trailed off, lying through his teeth. “And anyway, there's nothing on your face, you're fine.”

“Then why is Jean cackling at me like a demented witch?” You frowned, picking up another one of Marco's fries, but launching it in Jean's direction rather than her mouth. “Shut up, you sound like a freaking French hyena!” You pulled a little hand mirror out of your bag so that you could check. “Boys are ridiculous, why do I sit with y'all?”

Jean opened his mouth to retaliate, but Marco cut him off quickly. “Who were you texting?”

“Huh?” You frowned, looking up from the mirror. “Oh, just Bertholdt.”

And Marco felt like he'd been punched in the stomach. Bertholdt had been one of their friends who had left town for college, but he came back pretty frequently to see his parents and brother and hang out with his friends. Surely this wasn't going to happen again?  They weren't like... reconciling through text messaging? As selfish as it was, for now Marco needed you to be single, if only at least until he figured his head out and go over this pathetic, one-sided crush bullshit. Because until then he wasn't going to able to pretend to be happy for her. “Oh, he okay?”

Reiner snorted from across the table. “Oh God, is he asking you for tips now too? He's got it bad.. I keep telling him to just grow some balls already and talk to her, but so far he's rejecting my advice. I dunno why though, it's pretty good advice.” And wow Reiner was Marco's knight in armour on a white horse carrying a rose.

You laughed. “Yep, that's exactly it. He said that Ymir's up visiting Christa and they all went to get coffee last night after he'd finished his classes and found out that Christa'd invited her along.” She shook her head fondly in Reiner's direction before diverting her attention back to Marco as she fished a tube of lip cream from her bag. “He's met some girl, Annie? I think that's what he said her name was. Anyway, he's really taken with her but he's never actually spoken to her. Christa keeps trying to push them together... so far it's not working. He says that she just glares at him a lot, but he also says that he doesn't think that's because of him, she's like that to everyone. Anyway, I told him to just man up and tell her, or he'll never get anywhere with her otherwise.” You shrugged and shoved your phone, the lip cream and mirror back into your bag. “Anyway, I gotta jet. I promised Sasha I'd meet her before her next class.” You leant over and pressed a kiss into Marco's cheek, which of course he felt up up as a blush spread up over them. “I'll see you tonight, Marco. Bye guys!” You shot a wave over your shoulder to Jean and Reiner as you walked over to the door of the cafeteria, bag slung over your shoulder, Marco not missing the way your hips swayed.

“That was a hint.” Jean muttered, as soon as you were out of earshot.

Marco looked up and frowned, he was still basking in the feeling of your lips against his cheek. Could he not just... get a minute to appreciate it? “What are you talking about?”

Jean rolled his eyes. “Did you even hear what she said? God, open your eyes.” He cleared his throat and then put on a hideously high-pitched voice that sounded absolutely nothing like yours. “I told him he should just man up and tell her, otherwise he'll never get anywhere!”

“Well,” Marco swallowed. “Bertholdt's not going to get anywhere otherwise, if he wants that Annie girl he really should just ask her out and get it over with.”

“Can think of someone else who needs to do that,” Reiner chimed in. Oh no, not you too Reiner, not you too. Could Marco really not get a break from his so-called friends?

“See!” Jean spluttered, pointing exaggeratedly at Reiner. “It's not just me! He thinks it too! He thinks you need to man up and tell her you want her.”

“I don't want her, Jean!” Marco snapped back. “She's literally just one of my best friends.”

“Well, last time I checked you were calling me one of your best friends too,” Jean retorted. “And ohmygod, I really fucking hope you don't look at me the way you look at her because you look like you're going to bend her over the table... or eat her. Either way, it's creepy as fuck and you need to get this shit out of  your system.”

Marco pushed the almost empty plate away from him, shot a look at Reiner who was solemnly nodding to Jean's words, then pulled his backpack from underneath the table. “Yeah I think I'm gonna head to Psych early to try and get a decent seat. I'll talk to you later when you're not being ridiculous, see you later.” He shifted his backpack onto his back and grabbed his plate to drop by the rack of dirty ones.

Reiner simply said his goodbye, but Jean snorted. “Yeah and later I'll still be trying to get you to admit that in your mind you're married to her, with like four really annoying kids or something, you've got it bad. I know, Reiner knows, she knows and I'm pretty sure that that dude Eren's dating that we haven't even met yet knows.”

Marco didn't look back, trying to ignore Jean's words. You didn't know, did you? No, there was no way you could know... you probably just assumed he was being creepy or something and he felt kind of sick at the thought of her knowing but not saying anything. What if you were just being your normal sweet self and not saying anything to save him the embarrassment? God, if you did know could you just give him so sign that you did so that he could just die in peace? This was awful. He really did need to talk to you. To tell you.

But he wouldn't, because you were you and you were perfect and you could do better than stupid, boring, freckled Marco Bodt and you deserved so much more than he could give you. He knew it, deep down you probably did too. And he needed you, he needed you in his life because you were his friend and you'd been his friend for much, much longer than this had been an issue and he needed to get over it and get over it now so that he could move on with his life. Hell, maybe he should see if you still had Mina's number and text her, because if he remembered right then she was going to visit in a couple of weeks to catch up with you. Maybe she had some time to catch up with him too and he could see if he still had the ability to like someone who wasn't you. He put his plate down, a little heavier than he intended too.

“Hey, Marco, you okay dude?” Marco looked up to see one of the guys from his Psych class standing next to him, looking vaguely concerned. Oh, he wasn't that familiar with Thomas Wagner, but from what he did know about him he seemed like a decently cool guy, they'd only spoken a handful of times but they did tend to end up sitting near each other. “You seem a little... angry.”

“Oh, I'm fine, just a little stressed because I have a test later and I don't think I studied hard enough for it,” Marco lied through his teeth. Sure, he thought Thomas was decent but he wasn't about to spill his guts to the guy. Nah, Thomas didn't need to know about how he was in love with one of his best friends and the other one was in the running for douche of the year because he thought it was fun to play cupid. “You heading to Psych?”

Thomas studied Marco's face for a second, then shrugged, obviously believing everything that Marco had told him, after all what reason did he have to doubt? “Yeah, I'll walk there with you,” he followed Marco as Marco walked towards the door to the cafeteria, their footsteps falling into sync. “I kind of wanted to talk to you anyway.”

“Oh?” Marco asked, because Thomas didn't usually miss class, so he wouldn't need notes or anything and he couldn't think of another reason for what Thomas would want from him. “Okay?”

“Yeah,” Thomas nodded. “You're always with that girl right.” And oh God, Marco hoped that it wasn't your name he was going to say, but of course, the next words that left Thomas' mouth were your name. And the way he said it was less than a question and more of a statement. “I was just wondering if you guys were... you know, together?”

Oh.

No.

Part of Marco wanted to snap at Thomas, tell him that yeah he was with you and that he should just not speak to you, or even look at you again. But what if Thomas ever spoke to you and told you what Marco had said? Yeah, you'd probably be pretty pissed off at him for speaking for you and for dragging you into a lie. You'd never appreciated that, even when yo0u were kids and Marco had tried to get you to cover for him for something he shouldn't have done. The other part of him knew that he should just tell Thomas the truth, that yeah he was always with you but he wasn't with you, but he was in love with you and could Thomas please just fucking leave you alone? “No,” is what he settled on. “We're not together. She's my best friend, I've known her since I was like... six.”

“You're childhood friends? That's cute.” Thomas smiled and Marco wanted to smack that smile off of Thomas' face. It was more of a smirk than a smile and Marco had changed his mind, Thomas was not a cute dude, he was a loser, a life-ruiner and Marco hated him. “So... I was thinking about maybe asking her if she wanted to go to the movies with me or something? I mean even you must have noticed what a hottie she is.”

A hottie? You were way more than a hottie, you had about a million amazing qualities and sure, the fact that you were pretty was up there but but that's what he decided to judge you on? Her looks. “I can't say I've noticed...” Marco replied, noticing how strained his own voice came out. “But I know that she wants to see Justice League.” Oh dammit, why had he told him that? Why had his brain volunteered that information without his permission, he and his brain were going to fall out.

Thomas nodded at the information as the two of them paused outside of the Psych classroom. “Cool, cool. I guess I'll ask her if she wants to go see it tonight or something.” He turned to walk into the room, but paused again to turn and face Marco. “Thanks Marco, you're a good friend.

Marco rolled his eyes, scrolling through the texts on his phone. He'd just gotten out of the shower and was about ready to go out with his friends, but no apparently that wasn't going to happen. This morning he'd received a text from Reiner who was supposed to be hanging out with Marco and Jean that night, explaining that he'd decided to take a last minute trip up to visit Christa and Bertholdt to do some serious wingman business. And since then, he'd received calls from not one, not two, but four more various friends, the most reason one from Jean saying that he was cancelling the planned video game night because Mikasa had found a place for him in her busy schedule. Now Marco knew that that this just meant that Mikasa was bored, rather than anything else and she knew that Jean would come running... but still, he'd had enough of being ditched by his friends other the last cuple of months. The second text was from Mikasa, letting him know she'd asked some people to come hang out if he wanted to come and he sucked, but he'd smirked because he couldn't help it and he he knew that Jean was going to be pissed if anyone else showed up, luckily for Jean he had he no plans to. The other two texts were from you.

Marco didn't want to think about you, because he knew that you were probably letting him know that Thomas had surprised you with flowers or something like that, after all Thomas was your favourite topic of conversation these days and he hated it. When she'd agreed to go out with Thomas, yeah it had hurt but he hadn't expected it to be like this, he hadn't expected the one movie date to turn into the two of you full on dating and for Thomas to commandeer a good percentage of your time. He hadn't expected that your lunchtimes would be hijacked by him and your weekends to be spent around him all the goddamn time. The more he got to know Thomas, the less he liked him and the less he considered him to be the type of guy you'd be into and he had no idea why you were still wasting your time with him.

It hurt, not only because he was still in love with you, that... that was a feeling he just couldn't shift or turn off. No, it hurt because the closer she got to Thomas, the less he wanted you around. He'd started drifting away from her the more that Thomas invaded their lives, but in the past month he'd barely even spoken to you. He'd reply to your texts, sure, he'd say hey if he passed you in the halls. But if you found a spare five minutes to come over and see him, he'd tell his parents to tell you he wasn't home. If you asked him if he was gonna come and eat with you guys, he'd tell you that he had something else to do and skip out on food entirely. He just couldn't be around you any more, he couldn't listen to stories about Thomas anymore. He'd always known that the two of you were never going to be something that was going to happen, but it had gotten to the point where he had to stay away from you for his own sanity, if he could stay away from you for now, then you might be able to save your friendship. Hell, in ten years you could be sitting around your parents table with your significant others and maybe a couple of kids running around, laughing at how he used to crush on you.

And the worst thing was, you'd noticed that something was up, you'd called him out on not hanging around with you so much anymore more than once and he'd just dismissed it and told you that you were imagining things, but he knew that you knew that he was avoiding you. And you were intelligent enough to realize that he'd started to drift away from you when Thomas had come onto the scene, so he didn't know why you just didn't address it and get it over with. He was sure you'd talked about it with Thomas because Thomas was someone who had definitely noticed. And that was one of the bigger reasons he'd decided to just... let you go. It wasn't worth the humiliation, the looks of pity that Thomas would shoot him when he reached out to grab your hand, or touch your arm. He always had to be fucking touching you, like he wanted to let everyone know that you were his property and his property alone.

Marco stared at the phone in front of him and swallowed, he couldn't ignore it anymore, he had to know what words you'd said to him, he knew that they were going to hurt him and he knew that he wasn't going to reply to them with more than a 'cool' or an 'okay', but he needed to know what they said nonetheless.

“Can't believe u ditched me last nite! Come on Maru, ur my best friend! Free 2night, T&Mina doing something...”

He frowned at the words. Did that mean that Thomas and Mina were doing something together or separately, because Mina was coming into town a hell of a lot more these days and it seemed like Thomas was always busy when she was in town... Oh God, what was he even thinking? As if you'd let Mina get close enough to your precious Thomas for something like that to happen. He scrolled down to the second text.

“Unless ur what Mina's doing 2nite? If so have fun and be careful ;)”

Marco had to roll his eyes to himself at that, of course he was being ridiculous, of course they were doing something separately. And he really wished that you'd just let his Mina thing go, yeah Marco had liked Mina once, he'd dated her once. But that was back in high school and to be honest, yeah he'd considered seeing if Mina wanted to be a distraction from his stupid crush on his best friend, but he'd ditched that idea about five minutes after it had occurred to him and you still bought up the idea of him and Mina every time she was in town.

He scrolled back to the beginning of the text conversation and looked through the meagre amount of texts you'd exchanged ever since you'd gotten together with Thomas. He should probably delete them, it did nothing but hurt him to see your name on the screen when he went through his inbox, scrolling through them he deleted some and paused to read the ones that stood out to him.

“Hey Maru!  Can't come over and help u study 2nite. That Thomas Wagner guy asked me out. Can u believe someone actually wants 2 take me on a date?! LOL! I'll see u 2moro” Had marked the beginning of the end, the first time you'd ditched him for Thomas. That was two months ago and he still didn't understand why you'd seemed so surprised that someone would be interested in you, how could you not know how perfect you were?

“Hey Maru! Forgot 2 tell u that I have another date with T tonight. How has someone wanted 2 take me on five dates?? Sorry 2 skip study date again, I'll see u tomorrow! <3 u!” Had comer a couple of weeks later, the second time you'd ditched out on him.

A month ago, when Bertholdt and Christa and Mina and a few other friends were in town for break and they'd arranged a huge night out together, you'd ditched then because “Apparently we've been d8ing for amonth now?! Ccan't come 2nit, surprise dinner. I'll c u tomorrow mayb? <3 u!” That was the night he'd decided that he was just going to let you go and avoid you until he could deal with things. Apparently you and Thomas had stopped by and met up with everyone after Marco had left and apparently Thomas had gotten kind of drunk and ditched you, leaving Jean to walk you home, that had angered Marco and he'd wanted to have words with Thomas but he'd decided that ultimately you were a big girl and you could look after yourself.

The text between that and this weekend were few and far between. They were mainly you asking if you could come over and hang out with him and him turning you down because he had other things to do. Or at least that's what he'd been telling you anyway. On Thursday he'd gotten “hey, mina gets in2 town 2night I gonna come hang out?? I kno she'd love 2 see u this time!” this had been something like Mina's third visit in the past couple of months and so Marco had replied and told you that he'd think about it and gone to Jean's to play Overwatch instead. And that night had sucked because Jean had decided to ask him if he realized how awkward he was making shit for everyone and then later on that night he'd gotten “Marco! I miss ur freckley face. Why didn't u come???? I feel like u never wanna hang out anymore. Did I do something wrong? :( Mina was disappointed and Thomas spent most of the night comforting her. Cant believe we've been2gether for 2 months now.” That one had hurt... he'd been really pleased to see that she missed him but then she'd thrown Thomas in there too and um, no.

Last night had brought “Hang out with me tonight?! T's is going out with friends and Minas doing something 2?? <3 u, text me back...2nite... don't reply with 1 word tmrw.” He sighed, looking at the 'maybe' he'd sent back at her. He was just hovering over the delete button to get rid of the conversation when the phone buzzed in his hand, indicating a new text.

You. Again. Damn.

Marco opened it and frowned at the words that appeared on his screen, an actual legible text and not in your stupid text talk so he knew it must be serious. “Guess you weren't what Mina was doing tonight after all...” And what was that even supposed to mean? Because he got the chance to reply, it buzzed again. “I swear if you ignore that, I'll throw rocks at your window.” He frowned and looked over at the window. What were you even talking about? His phone vibrated again. Another text from you. “I know you're there, I can see your light on and your window is open.”

Marco's eyes flickered to the lamp next to his bed, before he climbed off it and crossed the room to the half-open window to look out. And there he saw someone – presumably you – standing outside the Bodt's house on the front lawn. When he moved his curtain to peek out, you looked up. He sighed. Okay, fuck. He guessed he was going to have to go down and talk to you or something. He threw his phone onto his bed and headed downstairs.

“Hey.” You said as he opened the door. “Nice Spiderman boxers, you're still alive then?” Crap, he'd deserved that and double crap, he'd been so preoccupied by his phone that he'd forgotten to grab pants and then with you standing outside...

He crossed his arms across his freckled chest. “Hey,” he replied, trying to  ignore the nagging feeling of guilt at the bottom of his (bare) stomach at her second comment.

“Are you going to let me in or not?”

Marco stepped to the side, allowing you access to his house. Now that you were in the light, he could see the redness of your eyes, the tear tracks that had left their mark on your face. Wait, what exactly had happened between the initial texts shed sent him tonight and now. “What's going on?”

“Can we talk?” You asked, not actually waiting for an answer before you pushed past him and up the stairs towards his room, just like you'd always done, right from back when you were kids. He had little choice but to follow you and watched as you kicked off your flat and settled down onto his bed. You looked down at your phone and bit out a laugh. “Oh, look, he's sorry.”

“Who's sorry?” Marco asked you, though he was pretty sure that he already knew the answer to that was going to be 'Thomas' and he wanted to sigh, to tell you to just shut up about him and that he didn't deserve you. But he didn't, he let you answer.

You raised an eyebrow at him. “You mean you haven't guessed? With the text about Mina?”

Oh. Shit. Shit, it looked like he'd been right after all and something had been going down between Thomas and Mina. “Shit,” was all Marco could muster as he sat down next to her on the bed.

“Shit indeed,” you snorted. “How did I not notice that this was going on? Like, it was obvious from the first time she visited actually... they got on really well and he kept touching her and I just... ignored it,” you shrugged. “Actually, I ended up leaving to go get chips... I did ask him if he liked her and he'd said she seemed cool and then she kept coming into town and he kept getting busy and well... I didn't want him to dump me and so I ignored it.” You swallowed. “Guess I can't ignore it anymore though, because I went over to his house to pick up my Bio text book that I'd left there and she was there, so yeah.” You lean into Marco and rest your head on his shoulder and within thinking, his stupid brain sends notifications to his body parts again and he kissed you on the head and you close your eyes, a contented sigh slipping past your lips.

“I'm sorry.”

You sniffed, moving so you could look up at his face. “Are you sorry that I got cheated on and was too stupid to realize, or are you sorry that you've been an asshole to me for the past month?”

Marco paused. “Both?”

You rested your head back against him. “so are you going to be nicer to me and stop ignoring me now? I mean I knew you didn't like him, it was obvious from the way you looked at him... but I just didn't realize that me dating him would make you hate me.

Marco chokes out your name. “I could never hate you.... I just.... he was always around and I didn't like him,” he wanted to have the courage to tell you exactly why he hated being around Thomas, but he just couldn't. Not now that it seemed like he might be getting his best friend back.

You sniffed. “You know, I don't know why I'm so upset about this, because the weird thing is... I didn't really like him all that much either. Well, I guess I did, he was always nice enough to me. But I didn't like him the way that he wanted me to like him. You know, the way I thought he liked me.” Your phone buzzed next to you, you picked it up and turned it off. “But it was flattering that someone actually wanted to be with me... but I guess Mina does the things that I wouldn't do.”

Marco swallowed. He had no idea what was going on here – you'd put him through these two torturous months and you didn't even like Thomas like that? “I thought you were pretty into him,” he told you with a frown. “Actually, I was pretty sure you were falling in love with him.”

You wrinkled up your nose. “No! Well, I mean I guess I probably loved him in a way as like a friend? But no, I never said those words to him or anything. I don't say those words to people unless I mean it.” You rolled your eyes, your voice coming out sarcastic and bitter on the next thing that you said. “He wanted things to go much further than just occasionally making out, so I guess I'm lucky that I brought Mina into his life. Though, technically I'm still his girlfriend, but whatever, I'll deal with that tomorrow. Can I stay here tonight? Mina's staying with me and I don't want to go home.”

“Of course.”

“You're a good friend, Marco.” You smile at him, your eyes still teary and lean back into his pillows. “You mean so much for me, thank you for being here for me.”

“Hey...?” Marco couldn't help but ask as he watched you snuggle into the pillows on his bed, apparently you weren't planning on moving to the Bodt's spare room where you'd usually go. He knew he probably wouldn't like the answer to the question he was about to ask, but he had to know anyway. “What did you mean by it was flattering that someone actually wanted to be with you?”

That gets a light laugh out of you. “Oh Marco, if you hadn't noticed I'm not exactly... flush with suitors, am I? I've only ever really dated Bertl and that was because Reiner pushed him into it and we all know that was barely a relationship. So I guess it was someone who was you know... not super weird wanting to be with me was a step up and I felt like I had to take that opportunity? I'm not a catch, I know that, but it made me feel like I was.”

“You liked Bertholdt enough to sleep with him at that party at Eren and Mikasa's.” Marco pointedly told you. “And don't say that you're not a catch.”

“I was drunk enough to sleep at him at that party at Eren and Mikasa's,” you retort. “And don't get me wrong, I don't regret anything that happened with Bertholdt, because he was my first everything, but I'm so much happier being his friend and getting him to ask out  that damn Annie chick he seems to like so much.” You swallowed. “I guess I just liked the idea of someone liking me. All I really want is for someone to tell me that I'm perfect and mean it.”

“You are perfect.” The words had slipped out before Marco could realize what he was saying. “Come on, open your eyes.”

Your head snapped up, you opened your mouth to say something to him but your eyes met his and you closed your mouth. Marco wasn't exactly sure which one of you ended up closing the gap, but one second you were staring at each other and the next your mouths had met and the first few times your lips pressed together, the kisses were soft, quick, gentle pecks. He half expected you to pull away again, to laugh and turn it into a joke about the mistake you'd made.

But you didn't.

You were the one who pushed for the kisses to become longer, you were the one to ramp up the passion. You were the one to pull away, to press your hand to his cheek and to look at him for a long moment, before you pulled him back to you for more kisses, harder kisses, to nip at his bottom lip and then lathe your tongue against it begging for entrance, for sloppy, deep kisses.

You were the one who pulled him down on top of you after you'd wiggled into a comfortable position against his pillows, to break away from his mouth, to stutter out “Marco... I...” to shake your head and not finish your sentence , but to just mesh your lips with his again. He'd wanted this for so long, so so long but a nagging voice at the back of his head told him that he should pull away, before you fucked up your friendship completely, because you'd been so hurt and even if you hadn't been as into Thomas as he'd thought, being cheated on would still be so soul destroying.

But he didn't want to stop.

And then your hips ground upwards and Marco gasped into your mouth, remembering that he still hadn't put pants on and he was still there in nothing but his Spiderman boxers and there was no way she couldn't feel how goddamn fucking hard she was making him. But you bucked your hips up again., searching for some sort of friction. Yeah, he needed to stop this, before they took things further than... this level. Because there'd be no going back after that. No pretending that this hadn't happened.

You must have sensed his hesitancy because you tore your lips from his. “Marco...” you breathed out, your lips were kiss bitten and your cheeks were flushed and Marco would be a liar if he didn't make his cock twitch in his boxers. “I want this,” and those words made him fucking twitch again. “I need this. Please...?” You purred and pushed your hips into his again. “I need this, I need you and I know you want it too...” and then you fucked moaned.

Fuck. Marco swallowed, unable to make himself move, he just stared down at you, into her much darker than usual eyes, you r pupils were blown with... was this lust? You groaned in frustration and pushed at his chest, wiggling away from him and he considered that maybe his hesitation had made you change your mind, that this wasn't actually actually going to happen. And then you locked eyes with him as you pulled the dress you were wearing over your head and tossed it onto his bedroom floor. You kept your eyes trained to his as your hands reached up behind you and unclasped your bra, your breasts softly swaying as you threw your bra to the ground with the dress.

She stared. Waiting. Waiting for him to do something.

Marco's eyes drank in the sight before him, this was something he'd thought about in those dark recesses of his room at night with one hand around his cock and the other over his mouth so he wouldn't wake his parents, but he never expected to really get to see it.

Fuck it, just fuck it. If this ended up making things even worse than they were now, at least it would be a memorable goodbye forever.

You opened your mouth. “Marco... I...” but whatever she'd been intending to say was cut off as Marco launched at you again, smashing his lips into yours and you melted into the kiss and gasped into his mouth as he reached out to palm your left breast, tugging at the nipple. “Fuck!” you groaned as your mouth left his and he buried his face into your neck, kissing and nipping and biting. “Please Marco... I'm so... you're making me so... I don't want to be teased.”

And he groaned because you were begging him. You were fucking begging him. “Are you sure about this?”

“Maaarco!”

Marco pulled back, taking a moment to survey the body of the woman beneath him as he knelt over her, hooking his thumbs into the lace panties she was wearing (was she expecting this or did she just wear these every day? Either way... hot.) and tugged them down her legs.

And there you were.

Fully naked.

In front of him.

Lying on his bed.

As he drank in the sight before him, you lifted a leg and pressed your foot against his hard cock, dragging it down slowly. “Taje them off. Now.” You commanded.

You didn't have to tell him twice, he tugged the boxers down his legs, throwing them to the floor with your panties. You were both naked now and he moved back towards you, sliding in position between your legs, he leant over to press more kisses to your lips, one hand on your cheek and the other wrapped around his cock as he blindly lined himself up against you, running the head of his cock down your folds a couple of times before thrusting once, one shallow thrust and he was inside of your hot wet cunt. He was inside of you and you'd bit down on his lip as he'd slid inside.”Are you okay?” He asked, kissing you again.

“Move,” you whined back at him.

Marco groaned, moving his hips as he set a steady, even pace with his thrusts. He kept his lips on yours, swallowing each moan and pant that you blessed him with. You felt amazing, it wasn't a surprise, he knew you would... but God you were so tight and wet and he fitted inside you like you were made just for him. He pulled his mouth from yours, looking down at you as he ran his hands along your body, cupping and caressing your breasts, paying special attention to your nipples. He loved the sounds he was pulling from your body, the pants, the desperate needy moans.

“Harder!” You whined. “You feel so good inside me, Marco... please”

His hands settled onto your hips as he upped his pace, his thrusts become harder, faster, as deep as he could go. The noises he pulled from you were getting louder, more desperate, the words you were saying to him becoming more incoherent. God you were beautiful, hair fanned out beneath you, your legs wrapped around his waist as you bucked forward to match him, your tits bouncing with each movement. How could you think you weren't a catch? That nobody would want you and you had to go for the first person who asked. He gasped out your name and he before he could stop himself, those words came tumbling out.

“I love you.”

“Kiss me!” You gasped, your own hips working faster now, to take him so deep and her begging was something he would never forget, never get bored of.

His mouth met yours again in a wet, desperate kiss, hands still at your hips as he pulled you against him to help meet his thrusts. He closed his eyes, savouring the feel of her tight around him as you kissed him again, biting down on his lip. Fuck, you were making this so hard to not... and this was you... and so he couldn't, not before you did. And so he slid one hand from your waist to dip inbetween you, to press into those pretty pink lips of yours and find the little nerve filled bud he was so desperate to seek, to help you.

You squealed as you felt his fingers against you, heightening your pleasure. “Fuck!” You cried out. “Marco!” His fingers worked against you, rubbing the flesh in fast, circular moments and the more he rubbed and moved his hips, the louder, the more incoherent your gasps got. “Marco... I... please... you're going to... I''m gonna... Marco!” was the last thing you got out before his lips were on yours once again and you started to contract around him.

Fuck.

He needed to cum, he was going to cum now. He pulled away from your mouth to kook down at you, to watch you writhe beneath him as you moaned his name. He upped his speed again, slamming into you desperately, your name leaving his lips as he came apart. “I love you, fuck, I love you so much!” his hips twitched as he released inside of you, him repeating your name like it was a prayer.

The two of you kissed for a second as both of you rode out your orgasms, tried to stop shaking and then he collapsed on the bed next to you, pulling your sweaty body to his.

And you smiled, leaning yo to press little butterfly kisses across the smattering of freckles on his face. “Damn Maru, I didn't know you had that in you.”

Marco couldn't reply, he was too busy trying to pull himself together. Instead he just pulled you into a needy kiss. When he pulled away, he looked at you and he said those words again. He'd already told you more than once during your little encounter, there was no need to hide it anymore because he thinks you'd gotten the message. “I love you.”

“Shhh, Marco... you look exhausted.” You tell him. “Close your eyes.”

And he does as he's told, snuggling into you as exhaustion washes over him.

Sunlight hit Marco's face the following morning. He groaned as he rolled over, trying to prise his tired eyes open enough to look at the clock on the table next to his bed. “Morning,” he heard a voice say and he froze. Oh shit. Last night... that wasn't a dream he'd had, he'd really taken you to bed last night. His eyes snapped open and his stomach sank as he saw you sitting on the edge of his bed, sliding on the flats you'd kicked off the night before. He coughed to clear his throat. “Where you going? I thought Mina was still at yours and you didn't want to go back.”

You stand up, cross your arms across your chest and face him. “Yeah, I'm not actually going home. I got another text from Thomas, so I'm... I'm actually going to go talk to him.” You won't meet his eyes as you say any of these words, his bedroom floor becoming very interesting to you.

Marco felt like he might vomit. You were seriously going to go talk to Thomas? After all the stuff that had happened last night? After you'd explicit told him you had no romantic feelings for Thomas. After the way you'd begged him last night? “Don't,” he says. “Don't go, just... come back to bed, please?”

“Sorry Marco...” you shake your head. “I have some stuff to take care of.”

“I love you,” he tells you desperately, spitting those words out.

Your lips curled into a half-smile. “I know Marco, I know.” you leant in to kiss his forehead. “I'm going to call you later, okay? I promise? You just need to let me go do this.” You don't give him a chance to reply, you walk to the door and pause only to smile at him. And then you close the door behind you and you're gone.

He buries his face into his pillow, swearing into it. You'd been the one to start everything, why was it too much to hope that you'd felt the same away about him? He closed his eyes, remembering the night before, the words you'd said when he'd mentioned loving Thomas. “I don't say those words to people unless I mean it.”

And... it hit him.

Not once had you said it back, not last night and definitely not this morning.

Marco's brown eyes were fixed onto the TV, even though he wasn't paying attention to whatever reality shenanigans that were on the channel his mother had left on and he hadn't bothered to change. No, he was still trying to understand what the actual hell had happened last night and what this was all supposed to mean for the two of you. You'd wanted it, you'd wanted him, you'd pushed for it and then just left? But... if you didn't have any feelings for him either, then why? What had last night even accomplished? Besides stringing him along. Why'd you run away? Back to someone you'd openly said you had no romantic feelings for when he'd offered his heart up on a plate to you?

And you'd lied, you'd promised to call him and here it was, later, hours after you'd gone. And no call.

Marco had been so lost in thought that he hadn't heard the knock on the door of the Bodt house, nor had her heard his mother answer it, so it was quite a fright when Jean burst into the room and threw himself down on the couch next to Marco. “Hey, what did you do last night?” He asked and then without even waiting for a response, carried on. “My date with Mikasa was a bust, Connie and Sasha showed up and all Mikasa did was talk about Eren. We ended up having to talk Connie out of going to find out where Eren was so we could stalk him and this new guy of his and report back to Mikasa.”

“That's because it wasn't a date,” Marco replied, eyes still affixed to the TV screen. He really was not in the mood to talk about anything that was at all related to the confusing female species right now. “She invited me too, obviously it was supposed to be a group thing.”

Jean let out a groan of frustration. “So why didn't you come? We could have ditched and gone to the movies or something.”

“I didn't think you'd want me to be there just in case I was wrong and she hadn't invited anyone else butt he two of us,” Marco replied, finally pulling his eyes away from the screen to face his friend. “Besides, I got busy with other things last night.”

When Jean opened his mouth, Marco braced himself for the next comment, half expecting it to be related to Mikasa or Eren and how good he didn't know he had it, but it didn't come. “Well considering how pissy you seem, I'm just gonna ask. Do I need to be buying an engagement ring for She-Who-Must-Not-Be-Named and the dickhead?”

“Not exactly,” Marco bit his lip. “Okay, I'll tell you. She caught Thomas and Mina hooking up last night, basically he's been cheating on her. She came over in tears and we ended up having this weird conversation about how she just liked the idea that someone liked her and that's why she's with him and... then things got even weirder.”

“Weirder how?” Jean asked, before his face broke into a smirk as he saw the look on Marco's face. “Dude! No! Seriously? About fucking time! Was it... good?”

Marco nodded. “Yeah... it was good, well, more than good but... I told her I loved her.” He winces in embarrassment. “Repeatedly, actually and she didn't say it back once. She stayed all night though and when I woke up this morning she was getting dressed and ready to leave and I told her I loved her again.” he winces again. “And she told me she was going to go talk to Thomas.”

Jean's jaw drops. “Shit,” he lets out a low whistle. “You spoken since?”

Marco shakes his head. “She said she was going to call me later this morning and she... just hasn't. I'm wondering if I'll ever hear from her again. What am I gonna do now, Jean? It's not like we can come back from this now that she knows that I'm in love with her and she's making it clear she doesn't feel the same way. How am I supposed to see her all the time? It's not like I can avoid her, not with us living on the same street and our parents being friends and coillege. I'm going to have to become a recluse to avoid her.”

Jean is silent for a second. “No,” he tells Marco. “Don't avoid her. This is her problem, not yours, she made her bed and now she has to lay in it.” And Marco swears that if Jean bursts into that YouMeAtSix song he's gonna have to kill him. “You've done nothing wrong, she's the one who's gonna open her eyes one day and see how much of a fool she is.”

Marco doesn't say anything, he just picks up his phone and looks down at it hopefully, willing it to vibrate  in his hand and alert him of his incoming call, hell, even a text. Ring, ring, come on ring. At least let me know where I stand. At least let me know where your head is.

“Put the phone down,” Jean sighs. “A watched phone never rings, if she calls you... it'll make a sound and just let her sort her shit out. When she's ready to call, she will.”

And Marco's just about to tell Jean to hush, that he's just as bad, if maybe not even worse where Mikasa is concerned, but before he has much of a chance, there's a very feminine cough from the doorway of the room and both he and Jean whirl round.  

“Is this... a bad time?” You ask, clutching a box of Krispy Kreme doughnuts to yourself and looking down at the floor, still as desperate not to make eye contact as she was this morning. Oh no, why had you come round? Marco would have definitely preferred if you'd just called. Seeing you standing there in front of him is making his stomach physically ache. You sheepishly hold the box up. “...I brought doughnuts?”

“I... uh,” Marco stutters. “No, it's not a bad time, Jean was just leaving.”

“Actually,” Jean crosses his arms. “Jean wasn't going anywhere.”

You roll your eyes. “Marco and I really need to talk Jean, please just do us a solid?”

Jean made no movement to leave, just continued to stare you down as you shuffle uncomfortably.

“Jean,” Marco warms. “I'll text you later, just...go for now okay? I'll call you and you can come back over and I'll let you talk about Mikasa as long as you want.”

“Okay,” Jean nods. “But are you actually going to contact me or are you just going to leave me hanging for hours and then just turn up with a box of doughnuts like that's going to make everything better?” He stands up, holding his hands up to the glares he's receiving from both you and Marco. “Okay, I'll go. But if I haven't heard anything in an hour, I'm coming back, because I'm a fan-fucking-tastic friend” He slings his backpack on his back and pauses at the door, tugging the doughnut box out of your hands. “And I'm taking the doughnuts.”

The two of you watch Jean make his exit and you take a deep breath, entering the room and sitting next to Marco. “Uh, hey...”

“I'm sorry about him, he's just... annoyed.”

“No,” you shake your head. “He didn't say anything that I didn't deserve.” You swallow. “I just didn't want to call, I wanted to come over and talk to you, but then when I got back from... his I had to pack Mina's stuff and leave it in the hall so I didn't have to speak to her when she came to pick it up.” Marco opens his mouth to say something but you shake your head. “No. Marco. Let me talk please? Just let me talk... and listen and then you can just... throw me out if you want to, but I need to get all of this out.”

Marco nodded, but he knew where this was going, you were going to apologize and tell him that you were so sorry and that you regretted it and you'd changed your mind and realized that you actually did have feelings for Thomas and you were going to save the relationship.

“I should have pushed you when I first realized it.” You bite down on your lip. “But sometimes when people have feelings for other people, they don't realize and so... I kid of didn't know if you'd figured out you were into me yet, or even if you were at all and when I saw you loom at me the way you did, I was just going crazy. I should have pushed you to admit it when Jean started unsubtley... well, I think he thought he was hinting. Or when Reiner started to join in.” Oh God, you knew. You'd known all along. “I waited for ages, Marco. I wanted you to figure out on your own and get your shit together, I wanted you to come to me and tell me that you liked me as more than a friend. I nearly brought it up like a thousand times, I swear, just to say how you'd answer and put me out of my misery so I knew I wasn't going crazy. But then I got scared, I got scared that you'd tell me I was being ridiculous and that I was just your best friend and then it'd ruin our friendship. And I didn't want to lose you, God I'd never want to lose you. So I gave up, I just figured you didn't feel the way I thought you felt... didn't feel the same way about me as I did about you, so I had to let you go. And then Thomas asked me out and part of me still hoped you felt the same way about me and that you'd... I dunno, come and steal me or something. But you didn't. And Thomas liked me, so it was easier and so I could get over you. But then you freaking drifted and instead of coming to tell me you didn't approve of me and Thomas, or didn't like it or whatever, you just stopped speaking to me really, pushed me away instead. That's why I kinda pushed the Mina thing to see if you'd bite or if you'd snap or whatever but you, Marco Bodt, are literally the most frustrating human being. Ever.”

Marco stared. What was even happening right now? You knew. You'd known all along and had you just confessed that you'd... he says your name to get your attention but you shake your head.

“No, I'm not done. I'm just... I'm sorry, I know I'm not making a great deal of sense right now but my brain is so jumbled and my heart might exploded out of my chest any minute.” You close your eyes for a couple of seconds and take a deep breath. “I'm sorry about last night, that wasn't my intention when I came over, I just wanted to feel like you still cared about me and I just wanted my best friend back. And then we kissed and I pushed things further than I should have. And then you said it was amazing and just everything about last night was amazing and I just couldn't bring myself to say it back because it wasn't fair on you. I nearly caved though, I nearly said it before you ever did. Am I even making sense now?” You groan and bury your face in your hands. “I'm such a fucking idiot.”

“Hey,” Marco tugs your hands down so you're forced to look at him. “You're not an idiot,” he says slowly. You'd just given him a buttload of information and he was trying to process it all and make sense of your ramblings. “But... you knew?”

“I had an inkling.” You replied.

“And... and... you have feelings for me too.”

“That's correct.”

Marco's heart felt like it might burst out of his chest. You liked him, you actually liked him back and he'd been too stupid to realize it. “And you have up on me and then Thomas asked you out and that's how you ended up doing that stuff.”

You just nod. “And I kept texting you 'bout Mina to see if you'd tell me you were into someone else or into me or whatever.” You look up and a smile graces your lips. “But you are into me and this morning... well...”

“So,” Marco asks. “You do love me?”

“That's also correct.” You nod. “That's... why I couldn't say it back last night. It didn't seem fair on you to start something with you, or say something like that while I was still with Thomas. Like, I wouldn't be able to properly mean it because I was still with him. All I wanted to do was get back into bed with you this morning, but I had to force myself to leave to go speak t him, because even though what happened last night happened, I was still with him. Not until I ended it with him, which I did by the way and we had a very interesting talk and apparently I'm a prude and he only liked me because of my looks.”

“I hate Thomas.” Marco rolled his eyes, where did he get off on talking to you like that. “But you're not with him anymore.”

“So...?”

“So...” Marco grins. “Say it.”

You lean into him and press your lips to his. “I love you,” you muttered. “I love you, I love you so much, I love you,” you pressed soft kisses to him inbetween each. “I love you. Am I all caught up now?”

“You could... say it again.”

You roll your eyes fondly, but you're giggling. “I love you. Are you happy now? If you still want me I'm yours. I guess I've always been yours. We're just idiots who had a lot to figure out.”

Marco leaned in and pulled you to him, pressing a longer kiss to your lips. “I've always wanted you and I'll always want you. No more Mina, no more Thomas. Just you and me now okay? Always.”

You smile and nod.

“Always.”

[languagequest]

Hello everybody, it’s currently 12pm on 1st January so I’m a little late (only a little) but last night was a night of booze, fireworks and my dog absolutely crapping it. Wow, I feel like a new person already

2019 is the year where I’m going to grab life by the balls. 2019 is an important year for me; I’ll officially become an adult in the coming April and in September I will be going to University, which means I’ll be moving back to the city on my own. Ooooh, scary. So, here goes, my goals. Feel free to make your own posts and have a go, I’ll be following a tag on my own blog of NYNMB (New Year, New Me. Bitch; because again, we’re grabbing life by the balls here.) Let me know if you have a go too! 

1. Weight (general fitness as well) My weight has always been a bit of a meh if I’m honest. When I moved I lost a lot of weight and I was a lot happier but the general look of me, I’m still not a fan of. In addition, my actual fitness isn’t fantastic. I might be a smaller size but I still can’t really manage stairs. Sounds awful I know and it’s a chore for me because sometimes I can’t keep up with others.

2. Studying It’s my final year of school and I want to really, really earn my 3 months holiday and not dwell on all that I could have done. Between now and the end of May I have 2 sets of exams - one in January and my real exams in April/May. What I really need is to get at least a C in my Advanced Higher Maths and trust me, I want that A in French. So, I’ll be aiming for a B in Maths and that all important A in French. On top of these, I’d like to get Bs in my other subjects too. This will be a significant challenge, especially in my German class where I have 1 50 minute lesson a week and the rest is self-study. 

3. Keeping my Blogs up and running I run three blogs in total - two tumblr ones and a Wordpress blog. The two tumblr ones are this and one dedicated to football, the Wordpress one is more of an endeavour as it’s a history blog. I’d like to keep them active in the new year and make my History one more active, hoping to achieve a higher rate of hits (above 167) that I achieved last year. 

4. Improving my Italian Over the summer I spent a great deal of time learning Italian, however upon starting school in August, it got left by the wayside. I seem to have forgotten the majority of what I learnt which really upsets me if I’m honest. So, over the next 12 months, I’m going to try and get myself to a level where I could sit a National 4 (Scottish Qualification) exam and pass. This is around an A2 level.

5. Going Somewhere I am quite bound to where I live. I’m not very good at saving money and I didn’t have a passport until this year. So, I want to go somewhere. Probably not abroad as I intend to go alone or with a similar age friend but it’s going to take some serious discipline in my savings and actually getting things done + booked.

6. I read, therefore I succeed I used to read so, so much but since beginning my National 5s in the August of 2016 I’ve barely picked up a book - I’ve been halfway through The Time Traveller’s Wife for about 6 months. So this year, I want to read more and I’m going to do my best, my goal is currently a book a month to accommodate the fact that school is going to take up most of my time until May but I’m hoping I’ll exceed that

7. Writing I’ve always wanted to be a writer, always. What tends to happen is I’ll have an idea, write it for a little while then forget about and go back a few months later and cringe my way through before abandoning it. This year, I want to write properly. I have full intention in taking part in NaNoWriMo in November this year but through the year I’m going to work on a single project (another problem of mine is that I work on too many things at once) and hopefully, get it to a standard I like.

8. What’s going on up there? (Mental Health) 2018 was actually a really good year for my mental health, which has suffered considerably in the past. It did start off very, very badly and I was heavily isolated from many people. However, the past few months have been amazing; I’ve made new friends far and wide, reconnected with others, started getting on a lot better with my family and leaving my old self behind, though she’s still there for me to learn from. In 2019 I’d like to keep it this way and make it even better.

So, those are my goals for 2019. There will be some updates that are daily and some that are monthly and there will be a big roundup on 31st December 2019! Good luck everyone!

[vetto17-teo11-andme]

tagged by @mxriomandzukic thanks as always Nicole!!!

RULES: answer the 11 questions. Make 11 of your own and tag 11 people!

1) When you were a child, what do you wanted to be when you grow up?

I actually don’t remember but probably a teacher

2) Do you like to read? If so, what are your favourite books?

Yeeeeeeeeessss! As for favourites I have like, a lot. Pride and Prejudice, Little Women, the Stravaganza series and Harry Potter series are a bunch of them

3) If you could go to any place in the world right now, where would you go?

I think Seoul.

4) What are your hobbies?

everything you can do at home, like reading and watching tons of tv shows. I also do crochet, especially during christmas holidays

5) When you’re feeling down, what do you like to do to feel better?

i usually just cry a lot, and then read a book

6) What are your favourite albums from your favourite band?

that’s so rood. but since my fave band right now is EXO let’s go with this. I’ll go with The War, Countdown and Blooming Days (this one by the subunit CBX) 

7) How many languages can you speak? And which one is your favourite to speak?

-in theory- it’s four. five if we count the now forgotten french i learnt in middle school. The favourite to speak is.... probably English? at least it’s the one i find easier after italian (even if ita it’s my native lang i swear i don’t know the words anymore)

8) Do you have a beauty routine? If so, can you talk about it a little?

AHAHAHAHAHAH no. I just wash my face with soap, put some cream and go to sleep. when i’m in the “treat yo self” mode i may do a face mask but that’s it.

9) Which is your favourite tv show?

for the english bunch it’s Dirk Gently’s Holistic Detective Agency. If we talk about asian ones it’s probably Love O2O and Exo Showtime

10) If you could turn back time, would you change something in your life?

maybe change high school sooner, or just enroll directly in a language-oriented one

11) Do you have a favourite childhood memory?

i don’t really think i have one, probably playing around with my siblings in our room

soooo here are my questions!

which is the first song that appears pressing play?;

if you had the chance to be someone else for 24 hours who would you be and what would you do?;

what’s the last thing you ate?;

what’s the worst song from this summer?;

do you make long term plans or just hope for the best?;

which (famous) person you can identify as your spirit animal?;

do you like to follow trends or prefer to stick to your style?;

what’s an underrated dish/dessert from your home country?;

tumblr on computer or on app?;

studying/working in the library or in a cafè?;

why did you start your blog?

ugh, how can I find 11 people to tag? anyway let’s try @matteospiano @cichypit @ivanzaytsev @karollklos @pallavolo-nerd @sassygenuine @promaja-kills @processedbeat @simxnegiannelli @juniorgunners @benpatchfc